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“While completely ignoring that I didn’t want to reconcile with him.”
“But I don’t understand. He’s really changed.”
Jay closed his eyes and inhaled deeply, moving his lips like he was counting down. When he let the breath out slowly, he opened his eyes. “You don’t need to understand,” he said calmly. “Frankly, my relationship with my father has nothing to do with you. If you had understood that, we wouldn’t be in this situation right now. And to make it worse, you’re sleeping with him. What’s up with that?”
“It’s not just sleeping with him. I really like him. I’m in love with him, Jay. What do you want me to do?”
“You tell me. What are you going to do?”
I swallowed hard, my throat dry and scratchy. Jay’s cold eyes burned into mine. I knew the answer he wanted, but I couldn’t give it to him.
“I see,” he said.
“I’m sorry.”
“Are you? Are you genuinely sorry for everything?”
“For most of it. For violating your personal space and your trust. For hurting you and making everything between us uncomfortable. But I can’t be sorry I reached out to Griff. I can’t be sorry I let him into my life and my heart. He’s an amazing man, Jay, and he makes me feel complete. And before you go there again, it’s not just the sex. It’s the man.”
“You just met him.”
“I know it feels that way, but we spent seven years talking. I think I fell in love with him from then, but I knew it was an illusion, so I put little stock in it. Now that I know him, I’ve fallen in love all over again. He’s done his time and has been released. Why should I punish him?”
“He might have served time for his crime, but he deserves a life sentence for how much he screwed me up.”
Silence stretched between us, heavy and pregnant with unspoken words that wouldn’t make a difference were they voiced. Jay was too hurt to analyze anything I’d said, and I couldn’t walk away from Griff like he wanted me to.
“What now?” I asked.
Jay turned his back to me. “You can’t be with him and stay here, Scott.”
A lump formed in my throat. “You’re kicking me out?”
“I’m protecting myself. From both of you. You’re two people who should have had my back, yet you’ve both let me down. If you continue this relationship with him, you’re bringing him back into my life despite me not wanting anything to do with him. It’s better this way.”
“Jay, please reconsider.”
“I’m afraid I can’t. I don’t want to see him, and I…I don’t want to see you either. Take the time you need to find a new place, but not too long.”
Jay walked out of the kitchen, and my heart clenched painfully. He was my best friend, the one constant in my life since we were ten. Losing him was like a punch to the gut, but he’d made his ultimatum.
It was either him or Griff.
Couldn’t he see he’d given me an impossible choice?
28
GRIFF
Iwoke up with a throbbing drumbeat echoing through every fiber of my being. My mouth was a desert, parched and bitter, the stale aftertaste of what could only result from too much to drink. Fuck. How much had I had to drink last night?
As I sat up, a wave of nausea swept over me, pinning me back onto the pillow. My head spun as if the earth rotated uncontrollably on its axis. Why was everything moving so damn fast?
I forced my eyes open and squinted against the sunlight filtering through the curtains. I was in an unfamiliar bedroom — large, elegantly put together with mahogany furniture and walls painted in soft hues of cream and peach. A chandelier hung from the high ceiling, its crystal pendants sparkling in the light. Where the hell was I?
To my right, a garment rack held a collection of high-end clothes neatly arranged by color. Men’s clothes. My heart skipped a beat, and I swallowed past the cottony taste in my mouth. I was in a strange man’s bedroom.
I grabbed the bedsheets and pulled them down. Thank god I still had my boxers on. But what the hell had I done? The harder I tried to remember, the more my head throbbed. The last memory I had was entering the bar. I couldn’t even recall what I’d had to drink.
