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I hold her hand against my forehead. I love you. Come back to me. I whisper over and over. Eventually a knock sounds at the door and my head snaps up, breaking my daze. Ana walks in, looking completely disheveled, her eyes swimming with fear.
“Elliot, what the hell happened?!” She cries, rushing towards me. I stand up and open my arms to embrace her as she reaches me. She hugs me for a few moments before pulling away and taking my hand. “What happened?”
I let out a harsh breath before breathing in deep again. “She was…driving to work, and some idiot ran a red light. Hit the driver’s side. Hard. The doctor mentioned a uh…hemorrhage I think…in her brain. They got the bleeding to stop. Which is good, I think. Her arm is broken, bruised ribs, and some minor bruising and scrapes on her face and chest.” I barely recognize my own voice; everything feels like an out of body experience and nothing feels real.
“So, she is going to be okay?” Ana asks in a quiet voice that I rarely ever hear come from her. Many find Ana brash but I always appreciate her bold candor and think it is refreshing. She walks over to Mads, reaches a hand up to stroke the ends of her hair and then holds her hand, taking the seat I was previously occupying.
“I don’t know. I guess with head injuries this severe, the doctors just can’t predict how she is going to heal.” I sit down on the couch next to the bed, taking a deep breath before looking up at the ceiling.
“It’s Maddie. You know she is going to be fine,” Ana insists, turning to look at me. Her glistening brown eyes betray the confidence in her voice.
“She better be, Ana. I don’t know what I’ll do if she’s not.” My voice breaks. Ana gets up, walks over, sits next to me on the couch, and puts her head on my shoulder.
“She’ll be okay. It’s Maddie. It’s Mads,” She consoles me as I rest my head on hers. A few of my tears fall as I try to take a deep breath.
“Thank you for being here. You’re a great friend, not just to Mads but to me too. Thank you,” I say softly.
“I told you, we were a package deal. If you wanted her you had to put up with me too,” she whispers back.
I chuckle, but it feels lifeless. “I know. And I’m still fine with that.”
I feel her shoulders start to shake as she quietly cries next to me. I put my arm around her, and I cry too.
I’m not sure how long we sit there, but we are jolted back to reality as the door opens again and Mads’ parents come in. They are both frantic as they come over to hug Ana and me. I repeat the story I told to Ana. Her mom sits next to Mads and starts to pray. I walk around and sit on the other side of the bed and gently bury my head in the crook of Mads’ neck.
I love you. Come back to me.
THREE
MADELINE, THEN
My alarm goes off at 6 a.m., and I shoot out of bed to turn it off, grinning because it’s the first day of college classes.
I’ve been planning for my future since I was a little girl. St. James University has always been my plan, not just because it allows me to stay close to my family, but because they have a great education program. I’ve known that I want to be a teacher since the moment I helped Ana with her homework in the third grade.
In my perfect plan, I’ll find a job as a teacher somewhere around my hometown. I’m not sure what I want to teach yet because I love most subjects. The only class I struggled with in high school was gym class. That’s only because I lack coordination skills and basic bodily strength. I’m on the shorter side, just under five-foot-four. I have a smaller stringy frame and don’t possess any kind of muscle or womanly curves. I’ve always been envious of Ana for her fuller figure. People often think I’m younger than I am because I bear more of a resemblance to a string-bean than an 18 year old. I’ll probably be thankful for my baby face one day, but right now I wish I could be treated as the mature 18 year old I am. Dammit. One time, I went to someone’s house to tutor them and their father opened the door and thought I was there for a playdate with their middle school aged daughter. I was 17 at the time.
As I get ready for the day, I hum under my breath. Ana and I were going to stay in the dorms on campus, but Ana’s mom had a connection with the landlord of this apartment building. We were able to snag this two-bedroom apartment that’s only ten minutes from school. Ana’s parents furnished it with most of their own furniture, and when I begged them not to, her mom told me she wanted to renovate their home anyway. Ana’s father is a big-shot lawyer so he brings home the big bucks. Our apartment is in the town over from school and it’s kind of close to the part of town that would be considered “shady”. But that doesn’t bother us. I carry pepper spray and Ana has one of those self-defense keychains that looks like a cat. I’m sure we’re fine.
Ana walks into the bathroom as I put my make-up on and shakes her head at me. She never understood the ‘morning person’ thing. “Good morning—” I sing. Ana groans as I continue, “—my beautiful best friend!” I give her a big smile.
“Ugh. It’s too early to be this happy, pollito.” I roll my eyes at the nickname she’s called me for years. She yawns as she gets her toothbrush out of the cabinet.
“It’s our first official day of college, An! We woke up in our very own apartment! I’ve got coffee brewing! I’m having a good hair day! It’s going to be an amazing day. Nay, year! I’m claiming it!” I thrust my tiny ineffectual fist into the air to prove my point. Ana sighs with a smile. She hip bumps me affectionately and I bump her back.
We finish getting ready, I prepare our coffees in our travel mugs—black with one sugar for her and super light and sweet for me—and with a quick squeal (from me) we leave our apartment.
When we arrive on campus and park, we follow the swarms of people walking towards the courtyard. The campus is fairly small with only four or five halls that hold most of the academic classes. The library and dining hall are in separate buildings. There are other buildings and wings, but I haven’t explored much beyond those few places.
“Do I look okay? I was going to wear something a little nicer, but I changed my mind. I’m going for effortless but still cute.” I tug at my white shirt tucked into my high-waisted dark jeans, white slip-on sneakers and a light blue cardigan. “Is this first day of college appropriate?”
“Yes, Maddie. You look cute but also sophisticated,” Ana says a little sarcastically. I glare at her and she laughs. “Seriously, you look great! You always do.”
I nervously adjust my hair. I pulled half of it up in a little twist, curled the rest and left a few pieces out in the front of my face. Ana looks literally effortless in her jeans and a cropped tank top. Her hair is in a messy bun that she wore to sleep, and it somehow looks even better than it did last night. Jerk.
We both have the same morning class, English Literature and then we part ways for the day. We have our classes on Tuesdays, Wednesdays, and Thursdays, so I am able to work as a tutor for the university on Mondays and Fridays. The university library hires capable students as tutors and holds tutoring hours throughout the school week. Ana works as a waitress Friday to Sunday, and some weekday evenings at a close-by steakhouse restaurant.
We walk into class, finding auditorium-like seating and I automatically start walking down the stairs to the front row. “No.” Ana jerks me to a stop by pulling my arm.
