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The unknown is making me anxious, I can feel the jitters coming back. I try to clear my head, and distract myself with anything else so I can actually enjoy this bath. It doesn’t take long to remember the feel of Nathan’s arms around me, his hard body pressed against mine.
When he pulled away from me earlier I was disappointed, not ready for our hug to end, but he quickly redeemed himself by getting the hot water going again in the bath. I imagine his lips against my forehead, firmer than the butterfly light kiss he gave me earlier. Would he kiss me if I asked him to?
What if I asked him to stay? To join me?
I shouldn’t be thinking these thoughts, it’s only going to hurt me in the long run, but I can’t stop. I imagine his body lounging in the tub underneath me, his masculinity on full display, gazing at me with that heat in his eyes that I saw before.
I would straddle his hips, grinding my hot center over his hardness. And I’d kiss him with every ounce of passion I have, showing him how much I truly want it, want him. I definitely want him. I’ve been attracted to him from the start, but that is only the beginning of what I feel for him now. He shows me over and over again how kind and compassionate he is, how dependable and brave he is. Qualities of a man that I know I can trust.
The responsible part of my brain knows that this is crazy. I have full-blown feelings for a man that I barely know. But I can’t stop thinking about him in all of the ways I shouldn’t. I wonder if he is thinking about me this way too? Probably not. It’s hard to imagine when he’s seeing me at my lowest, always crying, always panicking, he probably thinks I’m a basket case. Ugh. But he’s been so tender towards me, it’s hard not to hope he likes me too.
Glad for the reprieve from my thoughts about being killed or kidnapped again, I let the water turn to ice while thinking about Nathan. It takes all of my willpower, but I finally get out and dry off.
Suddenly, I realize all of my sleep clothes are still packed away in a suitcase in the back of my car. None of the bags I brought in have pajamas in them, and even if they did, they are on the living room floor, haphazardly dropped in the middle of my panic attack earlier.
Contemplating what I should do next, either I put on my dirty clothes from today, or I sneak into Nathan’s room and raid his closet for something new to sleep in. The latter option wins.
I walk into the hallway with my towel wrapped tightly around my body, glancing toward the kitchen. I don’t see him but I hear the TV in the living room. Assuming he is watching it, I enter his room. I’m halfway to the closet when I hear the dryer click shut behind me, I spin around and see Nathan standing next to his laundry machines, staring at me.
“I forgot to dry your clothes…” He clears his throat, “I had to rewash them,” he finishes, his voice sounding hoarse.
“It’s okay, I was just going to get something to sleep in.” I don’t move, feeling like I just got caught doing something I shouldn’t be, a little on edge standing here with nothing under my towel. I swear I see the muscle in his jaw flex like he’s grinding his teeth. His eyes bounce around the room, landing everywhere but on me.
I want them on me though, I want his eyes to burn a hole right through me like they did earlier, I crave it. I take a small step forward, drawing his focus back on me, hoping I’ll be met with the desire in his eyes that I know was there before.
“Is that okay? If I wear your clothes to bed?” I utter with a small voice, my tone not matching the brazen thoughts in my head. I wanted it to come out playful, but I’m not as brave out loud as I am in my imagination.
Through clenched teeth, he forces a “Yes” out of his mouth, but doesn’t say or do anything else. Not feeling as bold as I was before, I don’t push him anymore. He’s clearly keeping himself at a distance for a reason.
A small part of me is worried that I am reading this all wrong, and that he is just being a gentleman, taking care of a lost puppy until it gets the hell out of his house. He’s a man, and I’m a woman, maybe that’s all there is between us. Maybe this connection I feel we have is all in my head. I turn to the closet, ending this false moment I created.
“Callie…” He starts but doesn’t continue after I look back at him. Still flexing his jaw, finally he mutters, “Food is in the kitchen.”
He doesn’t wait for a response before he is out of the room and all but fleeing away from me. He’s attracted to me, but maybe that’s all it will be. I laugh to myself, needing to find humor in this crazy situation I ended up in.
Two men assaulted me and kidnapped me off the side of the road. Now I’m obsessing over the man who saved me from the bad guys. The only thing that would put the icing on the cake is if Nathan was riding a horse when he did it, a real knight in shining armor. He is going to be the star of my fantasies for the rest of my life, it’s inevitable.
I continue daydreaming about Nathan as I sift through his closet, enjoying the warmth that thinking of him brings. Not seeing any more shorts that would fit me, I boldly pull on a pair of his black boxer briefs and throw a flannel button down shirt over it. It’s long on me, hanging down to mid thigh, and I have it buttoned high enough that I don’t feel exposed. It’s comfortable and smells like him, so I’m content.
A little nervous to enter the kitchen after our awkward stand off in the bedroom, I take my seat at the kitchen island without saying anything. He doesn’t say anything either, simply tracking my movements as I enter. Without a word, he sits a plate of food down in front of me. I smile at the plate of grilled cheese, a little bowl of tomato soup in the center. Another simple comfort food, something that is much appreciated right now.
“I love grilled cheese.” I smile at Nathan, genuinely pleased. He doesn’t say anything still, but he responds with a small smile. A smile that would make me weak in the knees if I was still standing.
He starts eating his own food at the same time as me, tugging on my heart strings that he waited for me. I swear if he doesn’t cut this shit out, I’m going to fall in love with him in no time. Apparently I have no willpower when it comes to this man.
Chapter Twenty-Four
Nathan
Bullets flying past my face in war zones, helo rides being targeted with missiles, and hand-to-hand combat with terrorists. More of the worst things I’ve experienced, yet walking away from Callie back in my bedroom was the hardest. When I saw her standing there, only in a small towel, I thought I was going to cum in my pants at the sight. I wanted to throw her down on my bed right then and bury my face between her thighs. Grab her full hips and make her ride my face. It’d be too easy to lose myself in her soft curves, I’d suffocate, never wanting to come up for air again. She’s worn nothing revealing since I met her, and the towel did little to hide her full cleavage. I almost cracked a molar trying to restrain myself. It’s been too many times now I’ve felt out of control around her, something I cannot let happen.
I had to get away from her before I did something I’d regret, and I’m glad I did. She doesn’t need me coming onto her, I’m the last thing she should be worried about. So I splashed cold water on my face and downed a beer while I waited for her to come eat. One drink will only do so much to ease my pent-up tension, but I won’t risk over drinking and letting the alcohol cloud my judgment.
Then, she walks into the kitchen wearing nothing but my flannel shirt, fully covered, but still, my fucking cock jumps at the sight.
Gorgeous, she’s fucking gorgeous with her long hair falling over her shoulders. The curls are still full and wild, only the ends look damp from her bath. I know I don’t know much about her, but she could tell me she’s a swimsuit model and I’d believe her, easily. Hourglass curves, long toned legs, pouty lips I’d love on my…
“I love grilled cheese.” I don’t finish my thought, her beaming about the simple dinner I made distracting me. Her smile is contagious, radiating through me to my core. A smile the world deserves to see, but that I selfishly hope she only gives to me. Man, I’m in deep.
