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My chest squeezes. I’m so damn proud of her, but I desperately wish she had never been in this situation to start with. I kiss her forehead, lingering for a moment before breathing out, “Ah, sweetheart. I’m so proud of you. But I’m so sorry. You should never have had to do that.”
Her voice goes soft. “I didn’t think I could.”
“What do you mean?”
“For a little while, I didn’t think I could do anything.” Thea glances from me to Leo and Cole, then back again. “I thought I was helpless. But then… I realized I wasn’t. I might not have had weapons, but...”
A tiny smile pulls at her lips. “I never thought I was brave, Ben. But I was. When it mattered, I did something, even though I was scared.”
“Oh, Thea.” My throat goes thick. “You’re the bravest person I know.”
Chapter 24
THEA
As soon as we walk into Ben’s house, I burst into tears.
I was doing so well until now.
I didn’t cry while the paramedics checked me over. If I had, I think Ben would have shoved them out of the way and taken over. As it was, he hovered behind them, scowling and snapping, “Be careful,” whenever I flinched.
During the precautionary visit to the emergency room, I held it together.
And when I had to give the police my account of what happened, I squeezed Ben’s hand until I think he lost circulation, but I didn’t cry.
I couldn’t bear to do anything that might make Ben’s misplaced guilt worse.
There’s no way to mistake how he’s feeling—his guilt is written all over his face. Every time he looks at me, his eyes flash with pain. His features go stony, the tiny muscles in his jaw flexing.
I hate it. Ben didn’t do anything wrong. But the hospital wasn’t the place to get into it.
He’s not the only one feeling guilty for nothing. When Ben went to speak with one of the police officers separately, Cole came to stand guard in the exam room with me. Not that I needed it with Alec in police custody, but Ben insisted, and all the Blade and Arrow guys agreed.
“I’m so sorry, Thea,” Cole said, his brows drawn into a deep V. “It never should have come to this. We should have investigated further. I’m so damn sorry.”
“No.” I held his gaze. “It’s not your fault. I saw Alec for months and I never even guessed. You couldn’t have investigated every single person who visited the library. It’s not your fault.”
Cole went silent for several long moments before lifting his chin at me; the same move I’ve seen him giving his teammates. “What you did, Thea? It was really brave. And you escaping like that…” His lips curved up. “A throat punch. Really impressive.”
I’m still pretty proud of myself for that.
So I’ve been managing to keep a rein on my emotions all the way up until we get back to Ben’s house. Or is it our house now, since I live here, too?
But the second Daisy twines between my ankles, purring loudly, it hits me.
During that horrible time in the bedroom, when I was feeling hopeless, I thought about Daisy, too.
I wondered if she’d miss me. I wondered if she’d wander around Ben’s house with her favorite toy mouse in her mouth; the one she drops in my hand so we can play fetch.
It was just another thing I couldn’t bear to lose.
So when I see her, the last of my control snaps. One last straw added to the tower, and it all comes cascading down.
It’s too much.
“Oh, sweetheart.” Ben looks stricken as he pulls me to him, his strong arms wrapping around me. “I’m so sorry, baby. I’m so sorry.”
“No—” But I can’t get anything else out. Now that the floodgates are opened, there’s no stopping the torrent of tears.
