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We both gasp.
Before, I was in control. I was holding the steering wheel and I had command. But the moment I feel her warmth around me, I’m fucking lost.
I completely lose the game as I drive into her. I clutch her like I never want to let go as I kiss her bare shoulder, her neck, her ear, and anything else I can reach.
I get lost in the moment until it feels like all five of my senses are zeroed in on the points where our bodies collide. I’m not sure I’d notice if a bomb went off. I wouldn’t feel it if I was fucking stabbed.
She’s everything.
She’s moaning in raspy, breathless gasps, whimpering as her body tenses. I drive into her, one hand on her ass so I can pull her into each thrust and another tangled in her hair.
I finish inside her and squeeze my eyes shut as pleasure rips through me, making my vision go black and stars race behind my eyes. I collapse over her, palms on the table and still buried deep.
Each racing heartbeat brings me back to sanity, thump by thump.
That wasn’t the plan.
Thump.
I enjoyed that way more than I was supposed to.
Thump.
She may hate you, but you definitely don’t hate her.
Thump.
You’re fucked now, buddy.
I run my hand through my hair and pull out of her. I can’t quite look her in the eyes right now because I’m certain I’ll say something stupid and pathetic. I’ll ask her to forgive me. I’ll tell her I’m only being a prick because it pisses me off that I can’t have her. I’ll say that it didn't feel meaningless or casual to me.
So I keep my back to her as I dress.
Eventually, I hear the shuffle of her slipping into her clothes, too.
I take longer than I need to get my buttons done, still keeping my back to her. Part of me is waiting for her to be the first to admit something–anything. Even if she makes a light joke about how she was just playing along when she said she hated me.
I’m waiting because I don’t trust myself to speak first.
And then I hear the door.
I turn and see she’s rushing down the street outside, hands shoved in the pocket of her coat with her hood pulled up like she’s ashamed of what we just did.
I hang my head and let out a long breath. I look back at the prep table where we just fucked. I sigh, grab a bottle of sanitiser, a rag, and start cleaning.
I can wipe away the marks of what we just did from the table, but there’s no amount of bleach and elbow grease that can undo what just changed between us.
24
MIA
There’s an excited buzz in the air of Caroline’s bed and breakfast. It’s her first ever annual “Bingo Night”. For as long as I’ve known her, she has an unquenchable desire to start traditions and keep them alive. She lives for town festivals, events, and social gatherings. To most people, Caroline is the unofficial mayor of Frosty Harbor, because if anything is happening or anyone needs something, she is the first to know. Usually, she’s involved, too.
I agreed to help her tonight. It’s Sunday, and I’m mostly terrified about returning to work on Monday after what I did with Nolan. I’m not sure I’ll be able to work at Taste without seeing the spot on the prep table where we… yeah.
I shake my head and try to focus my thoughts on the moment. I’m going to be fine. It’ll be fine. We’re two consenting adults who wanted to blow off a little steam. Sure, there was this kind of insanely awkward and uncomfortable tension in the air after we finished. But so what? He was probably just reflecting on what a massive asshole he was for making me beg so much.
I’ll never admit it to him, but it was frustratingly hot.
