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“No,” I snarl.
My heart is pounding when I grab my purse and bag. The entire admin team gives me weird looks as I pass them.
The moment the elevator doors slide closed behind me, I press the back of my hand against my mouth. Tears are stinging my eyes. My chest swells with emotion.
I’ve seen Sazuki angry. Belligerent. Enraged.
I’ve seen him steely with silence.
And I’ve seen him annoyed.
But that look wasn’t just anger.
It was more.
Disappointment.
I didn’t think I cared about what he thought of me, but his expression left an imprint. It’s a weight I feel keenly when I get to the lobby and the instructors, who’d been huddled around whispering, stare at me.
My throat burns, but I keep my head held high as I walk out. When I’m outside, the sun caresses the top of my head. A gentle wind touches my face, whispering that it’s okay. That I did the right thing.
But it doesn’t help.
My heart is burning and the tears refuse to be held back.
I keep seeing Sazuki’s eyes. So cold. So stoic.
If he’d kneed me in the gut, it would hurt less.
I make a fist and pound it against my chest. What did I expect? That he would run to me when he saw the scrapes on my arms? That he would set me in a chair and kneel in front of me and dress my wounds the way he did at school? Did I expect him to fold me into his embrace and sway with me from side to side?
What the hell was I hoping for? And why are tears running down my face in the middle of the sidewalk?
I sniff and tilt my head back, trying to ease the droplets back into my tear ducts.
It doesn’t work.
I need to talk to someone.
Yaya is out with her Hearing Is Overrated friends, the deaf club that she attended in high school. I don’t want to drag her away from her time with them.
It’s too early for our girl’s night, but someone should be at the farmhouse, right?
On the ride over, I calm myself down. I know I acted impulsively, but it wasn’t like I meant to hurt anyone.
Maybe when Sazuki isn’t so angry, he’ll believe me.
* * *
“Are you okay?”Sunny asks, setting a cup of tea in front of me.
I accept it with a grateful smile. Or at least I try to. My lips aren’t working the way they should and I’m pretty sure I look like a feral cat right now.
“You showed up early. Hadyn hasn’t even dropped by with the decorations and snacks.”
“I thought… maybe I could help with cleaning or something.”
“Cleaning?” Her pretty eyebrows hike. “You came over here to… clean my house?”
