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What if I can’t give that to him?
Tears prick at my eyes, and I stifle a sob, choking it down. King stirs behind me, his fingers rubbing over my bare skin.
“Jules? You okay?” His voice, gravelly with sleep, startles me. I only nod, not trusting my voice.
A tear leaks down my cheek, splashing onto the pillow.
“Hey, what’s wrong?”
“Nothing.” I whisper the lie and try to hold back the wave of tears threatening.
“Tell me. It’s okay.” He caresses my arm, stroking it slowly, gently, breaking down my defenses.
“What if I can never have a baby?” My voice cracks as I contemplate the reality of our situation, and more tears fall.
“Shh, don’t talk like that. The doctor said it probably wouldn’t happen again.”
“But I might not be able to give you a baby.”
“And that’d be fine. I only need you.”
His words somehow make me cry harder, and now I’m full-on sobbing.
“Hey.” He spins me around, pulling me up against his broad chest. “Hey, don’t cry. We’re good.”
I bawl into his shoulder, long, racking sobs, until I’m all cried out. He holds me to him the entire time, wrapping me up in a tight embrace.
This. This is what I needed from him all those years ago.
And for the first time the jagged edges of the wound start to come together, the rough pieces of my heart healing.
“Thank you.” I say the words so softly I’m not even sure he hears. He rubs my back in light circles, rocking me oh so slightly. Comforting me.
Pressing a kiss to my forehead, he smooths the damp hair from my face.
“Jules, I love you. You’re enough for me. You always were.”
I gaze up at him, a lone streak of moonlight illuminating his face, and my heart stutters.
“You don’t know how much I needed to hear that.”
“I should have told you sooner.”
I cup his cheek, running my thumb over the stubble peppering his jaw. “You said it now. That’s all that matters.”
“I don’t deserve you, Jules. I never did.”
“Shh.” Now it’s my turn to press a finger to his lips, quiet his doubts. “You always deserved more than me.”
“I never stopped loving you. Even when you were thousands of miles away. I lay in bed at night and thought of you, dreamed about you. Prayed you were safe and happy.”
“The happiest times of my life were with you, King.”
He trails his finger over my cheekbone, down my neck, across my collarbone. Melancholy stretches between us, a dull, pulsing ache in my chest from all the moments we’ve lost.
I meet his gaze. “I tried to stay away. But I couldn’t do it anymore. I needed to be home.” I take a shaky breath, my insides churning. “I needed you.”
He doesn’t say anything.
