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“I need to remember the pain. Live in it. Exist with it,” he went on. “Or I won’t be able to do what I need to.”
Ohhh. Now I understood the dark, conflicted look in his eyes. “So you can kill?” I whispered, and he quietly nodded. “But I’m here so I don’t lose you,” I reminded him, keeping my voice gentle, but the need between us was still so strong. It was like a vibration between our bodies. Pounding. Relentless. Determined.
When he unexpectedly dragged his hands down my body and unbuttoned my jeans, my heartbeat slipped all the way between my legs. “But just because I need to feel pain to press forward doesn’t mean I want you to be in any.”
What are you saying?
He palmed my sex over my jeans, freeing a trapped moan from my lips. “You need relief, and I want to give it to you before we go.”
“No.” I shook my head. “You don’t need to worry about me. Not like that.”
I wanted to keep him from going dark, but I also didn’t want to stop him from finding Bianca’s killer. He’d never forgive himself if her killer got away, and if I’d been to blame, I’d never forgive myself.
So no, he didn’t need to get me off right now. Because he was right. There was a lot at stake.
“I’ll always worry about you.” He effortlessly hoisted himself up from the pool next to me, then bent down and reached for my hands, guiding me to my feet. “And I don’t want you hurting for any reason.”
“No, really.” My face was on fire. Probably every inch of me when he pulled me tight to his body, and I felt his dick twitch against the fabric of his wet pants.
He ignored my words and snatched my forearms, resting them over his shoulders as if we were about to slow dance, but then he lifted me, tossing my legs over his arms as he held me tight like I was his to keep.
Without ever losing hold of me, he slipped off his wet shoes and carried me around the pool and to the stairs.
“Where are we going?”
“My room.” He paused on the first step and peered into my eyes. “Alessandro wouldn’t have used it, don’t worry.”
“I, um, wasn’t thinking about him. Trust me,” I said as he swallowed my last word with a soft kiss, and then he finished the climb. Two more levels after that, never letting go of me. And I was certain he could carry me up a hundred flights of stairs without losing his breath.
He nudged the door to his room open with his shoulder, and I looked around the space. All cold, clean lines. No pops of color. Well, unless gray counted.
The blinds were only partially drawn closed, allowing the space to be dimly lit. Walking me over to a bed that could easily fit five, he sat me down and knelt before me.
My hands went to his shoulders as he removed each ankle boot. Socks next. Then he looked up at me, his wet lashes only making his eyes appear even sexier as he stared at me. “It’s time I get you off with my mouth.”
Was this happening? Here? Now? And why was I so freaking nervous?
His gaze roamed over my breasts and up to my lips, which were now a match to my nipples again, since he’d surely kissed the lipstick free.
“You know enough of the truth now, so if you don’t want me to ...”
I reached for his head and slipped my fingers through his hair as I gently pulled him closer, letting him know I had no plans to leave.
“I need this right now more than I need anything else.” His Adam’s apple bobbed as if he was trying to wrap his head around what that meant. He needed me more than justice?
“Okay.” I chewed on my lip, the nerves still getting to me. It’d been so long since anyone had been between my legs like that. Thomas had rarely gone down on me. But more than that, Enzo was ... Enzo. The man I’d been picturing all year, and now here he was, about to fulfill those fantasies. And for the love of God, could I get out of my head and back into the moment? For Pete’s sake.
“Maria?” A surprising grin flashed across his lips. “You back with me?”
I released his hair and rested onto my forearms to find his eyes. “I’m back.”
“Good.” He smiled. “I like you here with me.” There was something so honest and sweet in how he’d said those words that it had my heart squeezing. His gaze traveled down the length of my body to what would be mission impossible: removing wet skinny jeans.
Apparently, not so hard for him. Because he had me on my feet and the jeans off within seconds. The man was good. Damn. And now I stood before him in only a pair of black satin panties.
“You’re beautiful,” he said before dropping his mouth over mine, kissing me as if I were his lifeline, and I was able to offer him oxygen and a second chance.
His mouth trailed a hot line from my lips to my neck while his palms went to my ass, and he squeezed.
