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“Are you okay?” she asked when I’d yet to breach the silence hanging between us, only filled by distant chatter and music.
“I’m . . .” I gulped, my throat thick with emotion. “Duty calls, so I won’t be joining you all for dinner,” I shared, going with the more diplomatic answer instead of the truth. That no, I’m not okay at all. But thank you, a near stranger, for caring.
“Oh.” She gave me a polite little nod. “Off to save the world, then?”
I found myself smiling. Shocking, but it happened. “Now see, the way I remember it—that’s supposed to be your job.”
6
DIANA
“Do you believe in soulmates?” I asked my boyfriend over the phone while I studied my reflection in the mirror inside the guest bedroom of Mom’s Georgetown home—a home bought and paid for by Dad’s five-year-old scandal, just like every other purchase made by Mom since then.
“Is this a trick question?” William was in Seattle with his parents this Easter weekend. “You’re not expecting a ring when we finish grad school, are you?”
“Where’d that come from?” I placed the call on speaker and set my phone on the dresser while I removed my blouse, leaving me only in a nude bra up top with my gray wool skirt and tights. “We’ve only been dating six months. Why in the world would I want you to propose? You’re going to MIT in the fall for your PhD, and I’m clueless where I’m off to next,” I hurriedly spoke up, because the last thing in the world I wanted was a ring.
William started to reply, and I tuned him out.
. . . And the girlfriend of the year goes to?
Not me. Because after seeing Carter tonight, one thing was sure—I wasn’t just a shit girlfriend, I was a horrible human being.
At least last time when I’d lusted after him, I’d thought he was single, and I was younger. Now twenty-four, there was no excuse for allowing a married man to tongue-tie or fluster me. To make my heart beat faster. My skin heat. It’d been a case of goose bumps gone wild at the restaurant.
There had to be a scientific explanation for what was happening to me whenever he was near. I’d do some research later to see what was wrong with me. Maybe there was a cure, and if not, maybe I could invent an antidote to keep myself from wanting someone I couldn’t (and shouldn’t) have.
I still couldn’t believe I’d called Carter “Mister” Dominick. Somehow the word felt naughty when I’d said it to him. It wasn’t like I hadn’t used that word a hundred times toward my parents’ friends over the years. But with him, it hit differently.
“Are you listening to me?” William asked, breaking through my thoughts.
I freed my hair from the ponytail, letting my light blonde locks drape over my breasts, which were too snug in my C-cup strapless bra. “Yeah, I’m listening.” Now I’m a liar, too. I keep getting better and better.
“Then what’d I say?” Of course he’d call my bluff.
“Break up?” I hastily sputtered what was on my mind, having no idea what he’d actually said.
“Wait, what?”
Shit. Phone back in hand, I went over to the bed. “Um. Do you think maybe we’re . . . well, not soulmates?” I tried to muck my way through my verbal vomit screwup.
“Since when is that the criteria for dating?”
I set the phone on the bed and unzipped my skirt. “It should be. Why waste time with someone not meant to be your forever person?”
“I don’t believe in that bullshit. We fit. We work. We should be together. Are you drunk or something?”
One glass of wine at dinner was all Mom ever allowed me. She knew what two glasses did to me—and we were with her hoity-toity friends, so . . . “I’m sorry. Shit.”
“Listen, babe, I don’t believe in soulmates, but I do believe in us.” His raspy, emotional tone sliced and diced me. Screwed with my head. “Can that be enough?”
Could it be? I wasn’t sure.
“We’ll talk when I see you next week. Okay? I have to go, but just tell me we’re good. You’re on edge about not knowing what you want to do after grad school, and you’re all fucked up in the head about it.”
He had me there. But Mister Dominick also had me out of sorts. And I wasn’t allowed to want another man while being with someone else—especially a married man. Ugh, that was a hard no. “Just enjoy the rest of your vacation. I’ll see you back at school next week.”
“Yeah, okay. Love you.” He hung up before I could say it back, and considering how off my head was, that was for the best. I wasn’t sure if I could get those words out.
