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“It’s not like the sick bastard didn’t deserve it,” Evelyn remarks.
I snort before swishing water around in my mouth to get rid of the vomit taste. I spit it out into the sink and lift my eyes to the phone screen. “What am I going to do if it’s positive?”
“Well, the first question is, do you want to keep it?” Evelyn isn’t asking out of judgment. She’s gone into fact-collecting mode and is officially thinking through all the options available to me.
I glance at my reflection in the mirror, my eyes drifting to my flat stomach. I can’t even imagine what it’ll look like round from pregnancy.
Stop it, Rose.
There’s no need to get my hopes up imagining a baby when I haven’t even taken a test to confirm or deny its existence yet. But if there is one, the idea of giving up the baby or having an abortion sends my heart racing. I bow my head and lean against the counter as my breathing grows erratic.
“Rose.” Evelyn notices the panic setting in. “Take a breath and count to ten with me.”
I follow her instructions and slowly feel my body come back under control.
“I guess that answers my question.” Evelyn raises a single brow and smiles knowingly.
“I guess so.” Still, the problem remains. “What do I do if it’s real?”
“We can revisit my offer to find Michael,” Evelyn suggests.
Three months have passed since that fateful night. I wanted to wait for Michael, I really did, but the spell we wove inside was broken the moment I stepped outside the bathroom. Reality came crashing down on me like a bucket of ice-cold water, and I realized there was no point in waiting for him. Him and I? It couldn’t go anywhere. As much as I wanted it to, it wouldn’t be possible. As much as he continues to haunt my every waking moment and invade my dreams at night, it’s too late.
Because if living in this pretty prison has taught me anything, it’s that Michael is better off without me in his life. Besides, what if he’s moved on by now? Men as handsome as him don’t stay single for long. And if by some miracle he is, would he even want us? A girl on the run from her deadly father and a baby he didn’t ask for? I’d only bring danger to his life.
“No. It’s too dangerous for him. I told you that. If I am pregnant, I’ll need to leave Miami as soon as possible.” My marriage to Igor looms on the horizon, and something tells me he wouldn’t take too kindly to a fiancée pregnant with another man’s child. “Maybe one day, when it’s safe, I can try to find him, but until then…this is best.”
My heart breaks at the decision, but it’s the only one I can make.
Evelyn chews on her perfectly manicured nail as she studies the resolve on my face. “I don’t like it, but I understand. I’ll start working on a plan, but we don’t have much time, Rose. You have a banging figure, luv, but even you’ll start to show soon.”
I fiddle with the washcloth in my hands before placing a hand over my flat belly. It’s way too early to feel anything, but I swear I feel butterflies take off beneath my touch, and I don’t need a test to tell me what I already know.
I’m pregnant and completely fucked.
8
Michael
April
What’s the point of owning a multimillion-dollar security company with the best equipment on the market if it can’t even help me find one woman?
It’s unacceptable, and I’m furious. No. I’m beyond furious. I’m whatever comes after that where you’re just angry with every single fucking thing.
I looked for Rose every night I spent at Sinners, waiting for her to walk back through those doors. I imagined her apologizing profusely for leaving. On her knees, of course. And I would forgive her, but only after I took my displeasure out on that sweet ass of hers.
The cameras proved to be a dead end. I watched them over and over, replaying the moment she left the bathroom and walked out of the club. Our cameras tracked her outside, where she turned a corner and disappeared from view.
The days blend, and my hope fades a little more each night she fails to appear. Until every night becomes just another night. I should move on, but I can’t. Just the touch of another woman feels wrong, so I’ve stopped seeking them out entirely. Which has made for several long nights and even more cold showers than I care to count.
Instead, I’ve thrown myself into work. Between all the mundane work that comes with running our numerous businesses to overseeing our illegal operations and tracking down this mysterious Xiao character, my every waking hour has been consumed, and before I know it, months have passed.
Climbing out of the car, I eye the church with a growing sense of dread that collects in the bottom of my stomach. It isn’t the gathering of the most powerful families in Miami under one roof for the O’Leary wedding that makes me uneasy. Something else in the air has me sitting on pins and needles, but I can’t figure out what it is.
“Oh, I just love weddings,” Dominic announces as he steps out next to me on the sidewalk.
“Says the man who had to be bribed to be in mine,” I remind him.
