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“Why did you run out of myapartment that first night? When I kissed you?”
“I’m not sure. I know I panicked.I really thought we’d ruin everything. And I’d thought about youfor so long, then when it finally happened, I think I gotoverwhelmed. I don’t really know… It all sounds stupid now,” I say.“But I did go back to your place a little while later. Notsure what for. To talk? To apologize? I knocked a few times, thentexted you, but I guess you’d gone to sleep.”
Roxie shifts in my arms. “I wasn’tsleeping.”
“What?”
“When you came to see me, and senttexts, I wasn’t sleeping.”
“What were you doing?”
“I wasn’t home.”
“Oh?” I pull back and look at her.“Where did you go?”
“I felt awful, Chris. Low.Humiliated. I don’t put myself out like that, ever.”
Shit. “I don’t like thesound of that.”
“Yeah, you won’t. But I don’t wantto lie. Lying is poison.”
“So where were you?” This isgoing to be bad.
“I felt low and way too worked up.So I called a buddy of mine…”
“Oh, God. Not Dave.”
“No, not Dave. Never again Dave,”she says. “Another guy. He’s a good guy.”
Another guy? “I’m not sureI want to know more.”
“Look, Chris. It’s the truth. Ineeded to feel better, and I did. It was someone I knew andtrusted.” She shifts in my arms. “But it wasn’t you. And I reallywanted you. When I was done, and saw your text messages, Ifelt sick to my stomach.”
“Jesus.” Now I feel sick, too.
“Look, Chris. I haven’t slept withanyone else since then. That’s huge for me. You're the only one Iwant. It felt wrong sleeping with Rick.”
“Rick is the guy’s name?”
“Yeah. He’s just another buddy.Please don’t take it to be more than it was.”
I stay silent and look up at theceiling, trying to collect myself. A mixture of jealousy anddisappointment bubbles under my surface.
I take a few cleansingbreaths.
I’m definitely not happy to hearthis happened, but I remind myself it’s all in the past. I am whereI want to be now, and I don’t want to destroy this fledgling thingbetween us.
I turn my head toward Roxie andslide a hand over her breast. The nipple stiffens to greet me.“It’s hard not to take it a little personally that I get you allwet and Rick gets to fuck you.”
“Well, it’s your own fault. I wasso hot for you that night,” she arches her back in response to mystroking her breast, as small, high-pitched moans escape herlips.
“Yeah? Let me see … what did I do?Ah, yes, I spent a lot of time on your tits and neck,” I say. Ilean down, take a nipple in my teeth, and tug. She screams. “Toomuch?” I ask.
“No. Fuck. No. It’s perfect.”She’s already breathing hard. “Again. Please.”
I prop myself on one elbow andknead one breast while I suck and nibble on the other one.
“Chris…” Her eyes are dark andveiled in arousal, and I am already hard as a rock again. Her mouthis wet and parted and I brush it with mine, her tongue dartingtoward me, inviting me, and I follow, our lips mashing, tonguestwirling, dancing around each other, teasing the sensitive insidesof our mouths. It feels so good to kiss her, to taste and inhaleher. Her body bends toward me, her arms underneath mine, palmspressing against my back, pulling me closer, closer. I slide myhand down her back and to her phenomenal ass and I bury my nose inthat spot just behind the earlobe.
