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“I know some powerful people. More than a few would give me a favor.”
Maybe call in a loan that was due at a bank, or get clients to stop investing in the hedge fund of one of the mean girls’ husband.
Yes, I’d done my research after the Christmas market.
Katie shook her head. “No, don’t do that. I don’t want to sink to their level. Although it’s tempting to do that for your ex, for sure.” She tapped the can again. “How do you handle it, Nolan? You’ve been famous for nearly a decade now. And even a sexy, charming guy like you has to have haters.”
I pushed aside that she thought I was sexy and charming for the moment. “You’re right—not everyone loves me. But I mentioned before how Jenn helps with all my social media. Even so, stuff still slips through and finds its way to me. I just have to remember those people are commenting on a fantasy about some guy called Nolan Drake, who they’ve put on some sort of pedestal. Some idolize him, some sexualize him, and others feel insecure and try to tear him down. But it’s the work I love—acting and now, also producing. So I just think of it as having a lot of crappy coworkers that I need to ignore if I want to keep my dream job.”
“Hmm. Crappy coworkers. I’d never thought of it that way.”
I nearly reached for her hand, but instead crushed the paper cup some more. “It’s different for you, Katie. Fuck, I know it is. Maybe if you actually cared for me, it would be different. But…”
“But what?”
My heart tightened, but I knew what I had to say. It didn’t mean the end of us forever, just for now. “You don’t have to stay with me just to get a trip. You’ve more than earned one, and I’ll pay whatever you want. So if you want to jilt me now and end the nightmare, you can.”
Her eyes searched mine, and I took a risk. I allowed my feelings for her to show through—about how much I’d miss talking with her, laughing with her, and even her mouth around my cock as I fucked it hard.
How she meant more to me than simply a way to deal with my ex.
How she’d wormed her way into my heart.
How I wished to claim her as mine for real.
She sucked in a breath. “Nolan.”
I finally released my cup and put my hand out, palm up. “I needed to lay that out for you and release any obligation. Because here’s my truth: I want to date you for real, Katie Evans. To call you my baby, and spoil you, and finally have you naked and all to myself, with no interruptions. To laugh about the little things, or sit in silence on the beach and watch the stars. To hold close the one person who actually sees me and not my fame.” I took a deep breath and added, “I want a chance with you, baby. Do you want the same, knowing that a future with me might be tough?”
For a few seconds, she bit her bottom lip and stared at me. It felt like years, but could only be seconds before she finally placed her hand in mine. I curled my fingers around hers and then brought it to my mouth so I could press my lips to her skin. “Is that a yes?”
“Yes, for now.”
“For now?”
“Well, I-I care for you, Nolan. I do. And not in a brotherly way. But it’s still a lot—your ex, your fame, being the focus of the world. I’m used to being fairly invisible outside of Starry Hills. And at home, I can be outrageous and funny and find ways to take the attention off my appearance and move it to other things. But doing that elsewhere will embarrass you, and I don’t want to do that.”
I sat, stunned, as I tried to process her words. “Wait, you’ve been trying to hold back for my sake?”
“Well, yes. I know you don’t like to be the center of attention in your personal life. It’s why I held my tongue with Wendy on New Year’s and didn’t stand my ground with her.”
I rose, released her hand temporarily, and sat across the aisle, in a seat without a table. I patted my lap. “Come here.”
She didn’t hesitate to walk over, and I pulled her down. Once I had my arms around her waist and she put hers around my neck, I leaned my forehead against hers. “Don’t ever try to hide yourself, Katie Evans. Not for me, not for anyone. I like the woman who teases me about sex dungeons or being a sparkly vampire. Or, the one who dances with abandon at The Watering Hole when you’ve had a little too much to drink. Or, the woman who will do battle to win her family’s Fourth of July baseball game just to have bragging rights for a year.” I searched her lovely blue eyes. “That’s the woman I like. That’s the woman I want everyone else to see, too.”
“Even if it embarrasses you?”
The corner of my mouth kicked up. “Have you met my Aunt Lori? When it comes to people I care about, it takes a lot to embarrass me.”
Love. I wanted to say loved. But it was too soon. Right?
She replied softly, “I want to be me—the real me—but I’m not entirely sure who that is anymore.”
I rubbed her hip and leaned back to better watch her face. “What do you mean?”
“Well, for so long, I acted out to distract people and to help stop the bullying. Some of it is me, I think, but some of it is for show. I just don’t know what is or isn’t real, if that makes any sense.”
“Yes, I think I get it—the public act and the true you. I know a little about that myself.” I moved a hand and brushed some hair off her cheek. “But don’t hold back for any reason, baby. Say and do whatever you want. Think of this trip as a test. There won’t be many people around, so it’s the perfect chance to test the waters and figure out exactly who is Katherine Something Evans. What even is your middle name?”
