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Huh, it’s as if she knows Chad and how he only cares about business. But, of course, I’m not going to tell her that. She’s freaked out enough.
“Yeah, Mom, he’ll protect me; it’s going to be fine.” I bite down hard on my bottom lip, trying to stop any tears from bursting free. My eyes are burning with the desire to cry, but I can’t. I won’t. Not until I’ve reassured Mom that all is fine. “I actually have to go now because I want to go and sort this out right away. Is it okay if I call you later?”
“Riley,” she says with a heavy sigh. “I don’t like this one bit. I don’t know how much I can express to you that I wouldmuchrather you be here with me. This is… it’s a lot.”
Fuck, the thick ball of emotion lodged at the base of my throat is growing so hard I don’t know how to get any words out. I need to end this now.
“I’ll call you later.” My voice is gravelly. “I promise, I just need to go. Love you, Mom.”
She doesn’t say anything for a beat too long, but a tear is trickling down my cheek now, and I can’t hold off any longer, so I end the call without letting her talk, just adding guilt into the mix. Just what I need.
My head falls into my hands as the sob ricochets through my chest. Why did I let things get so far with Alex? Why did I have to kiss him outside my home? This was all a good bit of fun, blurring all the boundaries, but in a fun and sexy way.
Now, it’s a problem. I hate it all.
What now?I wonder desperately as my head continues to speed like a car down a race track. I know I can’t turn to Chad for help with this. There’s only one other person who might understand what I’m going through, but I don’t know if I should call him.
But maybe he doesn’t know…
The chances of him having no idea what’s being said online are slim, but it’s still a good excuse. I’d rather do anything than sit here weeping like a damn baby, which isn’t solving anything. Another thing I learned from my father is that crying solves nothing; only action does.
So, without giving myself even another second to talk myself out of it, I grab my cell phone and, with trembling fingers, I dial Alex’s number.
“Hello?”
For a second, I’m taken aback that he’s picked up at all, and the sound of his voice issoreassuring right now. I press the phone tighter to my ear like I can feelhim.
“Alex, have you seen?”
“The photos online? Of course, I…”
“No, I mean the comments. The online abuse.” Urgh, the heavy weight on my chest presses down even harder. “People are really coming after me, and I don’t know what to do.”
“I haven’t seen any of that.”
Alex is clearly in the middle of something because there’s so much noise around him, so the fact that he’s giving me his timewhen he has his own chaos to contend with is the slight glimmer of sunshine on this terrible day.
“Well, obviously, I’m being called names for kissing you, but there are people wanting to find out where I live and things like that.”
The egg yolk of paranoia trickles down my spine as I glance around. I know no one is in here now, but I don’t know when the onslaught is coming. I don’t know if I’ll ever be able to feel safe again.
“Oh, Riley, I wish I could tell you that this is just people saying things because it happens all the time, but that won’t change how you’re feeling. That won’t stop anything. All I can do is come and see you as soon as I get a chance. I want to protect you. You know I wouldn’t let anything happen to you, right?”
Through the tears, a small smile starts to appear. I can’t believe how sweet he is, how different he is from the man I thought him to be—cold and stoic.
“I know, yeah. Thanks, Alex.”
“Maybe for now, you should call someone to come hang out with you so you aren’t alone. Is there anyone?”
Instantly, my mind goes to Sara. I don’t want to bring any drama to her doorstep, but surely no one knows enough about me yet? I can go for a slice of cake, right?
“I mean, if I didn’t have a game this afternoon…” he continues, taking my silence to mean I’m completely alone.
“No, it’s fine. I have someone.” I hurriedly wipe the tears away. “I’ll be fine. Good luck with your game, okay? Play your best out there. Don’t let any of this get to you either.”
This conversation has made me feel a million times better, but I still don’t want to be here, where I’m afraid. Thank God Alex has given me some practical advice. Now I know just what I need to do.
Chapter 14—Alex
