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“We’re lucky to have you. There’s no telling what this would be like if it were entirely up to me.” She sighs.
“You would’ve figured it out,” I assure her. “I haven’t talked to you in four days because of the craziness of the holidays. How is everything going?”
"Pretty good. Things have been quiet. I've been getting stuff ready for the beginning of the year. Hank's not even been in the office, but Boone has been acting really weird," she sighs. "Like he's annoyed, scared, or pissed. I'm not sure which."
"Maybe he's just stressed," I offer. "It is the end of the year, and as a small business owner, I'm doing a ton of shit right now. As the project manager, there's a good chance he's doing a lot too."
She takes a drink of her beer. "It's possible. I don't know though. He's never made me feel like this before. I feel like I'm bothering him."
"Don't invite trouble, Lex. I'm sure things are fine."
"Yeah." She gives me a resigned smile. "You're probably right. At least I hope you're right."
We stop talking as the guys come in. "Bonfire will be ready for s'mores and late night celebrations. Can we eat?" Barrett asks, rubbing his stomach. "I'm fuckin' starving."
"Yes," I laugh. "We can eat."
* * *
"What are your ins and outs for the year?" Alexis asks us all as we sit around the bonfire a few hours later. "We need to go around in a circle and say them."
"I'll go last." Boone volunteers. "Somebody else start. I'm too old to even know what this shit means."
I'm sitting in Abel's lap, trying to keep warm. The last time I looked at my phone, it was in the teens with a windchill in the single digits, and we're supposed to be getting snow tonight. I'm glad we've opted to stay here, considering how much we've all been drinking. I turned over New Year's Day sales to my employees, if they felt like they could come in, and since I'm not worrying about anything, I'm really enjoying myself. "I'll go first," I offer, raising my hand. "Alexis and I used to do this every New Year's."
"Okay then teach us, because this group," Abel points to himself and his friends, "has no idea what the fuck that means."
"I've got you." I reach in and give him a kiss on the neck. "So, when you do your ins and outs, you're basically saying what you're giving up and what you're adding for the upcoming year. Some people plan them out, and others just do them spur of the moment. I have a feeling we'll have a good mixture of both since y'all didn't even know you'd need to be doing it."
"Yeah." Jasper wrinkles his nose. "Way to spring this shit on us."
"Quit whining." My tone is joking but chastising at the same time. "Okay, so I'm gonna do my outs first."
"Wait!" Barrett yells. "Is there a certain amount of each we should have? This is so much pressure."
"No." Lex rolls her eyes. "There aren't any rules. Y'all are making this more difficult than it has to be. She'll do hers, then I'll do mine next so you can see what it's like. Just let her go."
She's so exasperated, I have to laugh. "Okay, here we go. My outs are working all the time, talking down to myself when I'm having a bad day, letting customers determine my worth, and worrying so much about what my parents think. My ins are spending more time with the people I love, doing things that bring me joy, worrying less about things working out, and getting a full eight-hours sleep every night. Oh, and I'm gonna try to limit my caffeine intake, but that's kinda asking for a lot." Everyone laughs. "That's your ins and outs."
Alexis pulls her legs up in her seat, before taking a drink of her beer. "My ins are getting rid of my job at Monroe's, learning to leave work at my designated time, cooking more, spending more time with Boone, and getting a new car if I can find a good deal. My outs are being obsessed with my credit score, worrying about the weather so much..."
"You worry about the weather?" Jasper interrupts.
"Dude, she looks at the night sky before we go to sleep, and then when we get up. She's an eighty-year-old in a twenty-five-year-old body." Boone laughs, leaning away as Alexis tries to smack him.
"Anyway. And making excuses for my brother. He's gonna have to get his shit together and start pulling his weight at Monroe's. There we go."
Abel clears his throat. "Me next. I kind of like this. My ins are going to see my mom a little more often, making time to fish with Dad when he asks, taking this one out on a date night every week..." He tightens his arm around me. "And making sure my friends are good, even when they act like everything is fine. We need to start asking each other, and not just assuming. My outs are this fuckin' truck payment, my decorating war with the neighbor— I'm gonna concede. He won after his Resurrection Scene at Easter."
"What?" I turn to him. "How have I not heard about this?"
"It's not my proudest moment. I'd rather not talk about it. And putting off getting the important shit done. Procrastination wins out every time, and it stresses me out. I'm gonna do better about that this year."
We go around the circle, and it surprises me the things these guys are thinking of. When we get to Boone, I'm super interested because he's so much older than the rest of us.
"Alright. I've been following along." He leans forward, putting his elbows on his knees. "My ins are going to be, working less because I'm going to expect people to do what they're supposed to do, enjoying the summer this year, same as Abel, this fuckin' truck payment needs to be gone, and spending more time in my studio."
Oh, that makes me happy, because Boone is so talented at what he does, and I have a feeling if he would focus just on that, he'd be a millionaire. That's his business, though, and obviously he hasn't asked my opinion.
