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“It’s ... personal stuff,” I say, and it sounds pitiful even to my ears.
“Personal stuff,” he echoes, not buying it. “Care to elaborate?”
I shake my head. “It’s just ... someone I used to know. Working on getting them back in my life.”
He nods slowly, understanding more than I wish he did. “Look, I get it. If this is about a woman, we’ve all been there. But you can’t bring that back to the team. And you sure as hell can’t be starting fights over it.”
“I know, Coach. I’m sorry. It won’t happen again.”
He sighs, running a hand over his face. “I’m going to have to suspend you for the next game. You know I can’t let this slide.”
I nod, accepting the punishment. I’ve earned it and then some.
“You should go home. Take some time to sort out whatever this is.”
I stand, my legs steadier now. “Thanks, Coach.”
He doesn’t say anything else as I leave, just gives me a nod that’s filled with too many unspoken words. It was one fucking day. One misstep where I screwed things up with Lila, and I fully lost my ability to function as a rational human being.
The walk back to my apartment is a blur. I don’t see the campus green or the students milling about. All I see is Lila’s face, the hurt in her eyes when I made that foolish fucking offer.
By the time I reach my door, I’ve decided. I pull out my phone, scrolling through my contacts until I find her name. I type out a message, my thumbs clumsy on the screen.
Callum: hey, I’m really sorry about last night. wasn’t thinking straight. can we talk?
I hit Send before I can second-guess myself. The message floats out into the void, and now all I can do is wait and hope. Pray that she’ll give me another chance to make things right.
But as the hours tick by with no response, I can’t shake the feeling that I might have finally lost. And this time, I’m certain I was playing the most important game of my life.
CHAPTERFOUR
LILA
THREE YEARS AGO
“You’re shivering.”
“Yeah, it’s so cold out here tonight.”
“Hadn’t noticed.” Callum’s arm finds its way around my shoulders, a natural gesture, pulling me into the warmth of his side. I lean into him, grateful for the body heat.
“Thank you.”
He tilts his chin, and our noses brush lightly, a featherlight touch at best. “Hey, Li ...”
I turn my head slightly, and I swear our lips brush this time. Soft, sweet, perfect, painful. Or maybe I just want them to. Every last fiber of my being is screaming to close that last bit of distance, to cross the line that’s always been so threadbare between us.
But fear grips me. The consequences, the potential loss of our friendship—it’s too much. I pull back, shattering the illusion.
“We should probably head back inside.”
“Yeah,” he says. “Yeah, you’re right.”
NOW
I’m wrapped up in my blankets, pulling them over my head to drown out the stress of last night. But my makeshift fortress does little to muffle the replay of my confrontation with Callum.
His offer echoes, a haunting reminder that my feelings didn’t follow the same quiet ending as our childhood games. And he just doesn’t seem to get it. Maybe he never will.
