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Staring at my fingers on the table, I don’t want to bring it up. Not because she wouldn’t understand but because I’ve been fighting off these feelings for a while. I want to be with Bret. But I’m also afraid of the thought of not being with him. I’m the Queen of Kings. I’ve never given my silly nickname much thought, but I know what it brings with it. I’m a star, and because of that, I’ve thought about how I would even date someone else, given my fame. How do other celebrities do it?
“It’s nothing,” I finally tell Lily. She doesn’t look like she believes me, so I try to smile wider. “Seriously.”
“If you’re not going to tell me, then I’m just going to have to assume you’re thinking about Austin.”
“Lily!”
“Seriously.” She starts giggling again. “What’s wrong with him?”
“Okay, I’ll indulge you, if only to keep you from hounding on it for the next week. Nothing’s wrong with him. But, as you know, I’m with Bret.”
“Yes, Bret the Skum Bucket.” I can’t help but laugh. “But don’t you think he’s cute? At least a little bit?”
She holds up her thumb and finger, measuring an invisible pinch. “Of course Bret’s cute. That’s why I’m with him.”
“First of all, no. Bret’s … okay.”
“Lil!”
“What? Maybe he could be cute if he didn’t always try to dress like he’s in a Misfits cover band. He has those hazel eyes, which could be incredible if he didn’t comb his hair in front of his face ninety percent of the time. You know I’m talking about Austin. Matthew McCona-Austin.” She cackles.
“Fine, fine.” I raise my hands. “Yes, he is cute. In a sort of, dad-bod kind of way.”
“You don’t know he has a dad bod. He could totally work out six days a week and is just incredibly reserved.”
“I’ll give you that. Regardless, none of that matters.”
“You just said he’s cute!” she replies.
The door to the room swings open and in walks Austin, forcing both of our eyes to pop open. “Burgers are here!” We both exchange shocked stares. These studios are usually soundproof, so I’m praying he didn’t hear what we were talking about. “You guys are still hungry, right?”
Quickly shooting a glance at Lily, I can feel my face redden. I deliver a sharp glare at her, trying to telepathically tell her to not say anything. I don’t think she will; she seems just as shocked as I do.
“Uh, yeah,” I finally answer. “Starving.”
He pulls out the cartons holding the burgers, placing one in front of me first on the table the mixing board is built into, then in front of Lily. I grab the second bag he has in front of him, pulling out the fries, and take a bite of one. “Austin … thanks again.”
“Don’t even worry about it.” He smiles down at me. “Whatever you need, Kristen.”
“Kristen?” Lily shoots me a look before smirking up at him.
His stare bounces back and forth between us, and I see his grin morph into an uncomfortable smirk. “Uh … her first name.”
Lily’s grin grows wider. “Oh, I didn’t know you two were on a first-name basis.”
“Oh, no.” He clears his throat, then nervously averts his gaze. “I mean, it’s her alias or whatever while she’s recording here.” Glancing down at me, he looks for confirmation. “Right?” he asks
“Exactly.” I smile back at him. Grabbing another fry, I point it at Lily. “Austin gets to call me Kristen. You still refer to me as your queen.”
The joke breaks the tension, and Lily giggles, grabbing a fry, and throwing it at me.
