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She sucks in her bottom lip and bites down on it as she glares at me. “So that’s it then? You used me and I shouldn’t have come here?”
What a fucking joke. I scoff and say, “Yeah, Claire, I used you. That’s what happened.”
Turning to step away, she pauses, looking back at me with what I can only describe as disgust. “You know, we all have shit from our past, Aiden, but that’s not an excuse to be an asshole.” She walks away, and without turning back, she mutters, “Enjoy the rest of your night.”
“I plan on it!” I call after her as she slams the door.
And then I’m alone.
Even with the sound of the music inside, it’s too quiet out here. Or maybe my thoughts are just too fucking loud.
Doesn’t matter, I guess. Both are better than going inside with everyone right now. Walking back to the hammock, I plop down and try to pretend this day never happened.
Who the hell does Claire think she is? She’s the one who obviously plans on getting back with fucking Garret, and she’s going to walk in here like I’m the bad guy? The night I saw her in the bar, I should have minded my own business. I should have let her walk out that door and not gone after her. I should have let her ride the train to fucking Florida, alone.
My solitude doesn’t last long before the sliding doors open again. I look up, half hoping for it to be Claire, but it’s Sam who’s decided to join me.
“So,” she says slowly. “Do you want to tell me what that was about?”
“No,” I answer without looking at her.
She sits with her back against the wall even though I’m still in the hammock. “Well, it didn’t seem like nothing. She looked pretty upset.”
I don’t say anything.
Out of the corner of my eye, I can see Sam nodding. “Em says you like her.”
“Em needs to keep her mouth shut,” I snap.
A light laugh escapes her. “Yeah, well, that’s not exactly how she does things.” After a moment, she says, “Aiden, come sit with me.”
Turning to look at her, I rub a hand over my face before getting out of the hammock. I don’t know why I listen to her. I guess some habits die hard.
Looking up at me, she asks, “Did she hurt you?”
I scoff. “It’s nothing I can’t handle.”
She nods, knowing she’s put me through worse. “Why did you tell me to come here tonight?”
“I—I don’t know,” I say in defeat as I rub the back of my neck. “I guess I just needed to.” I slide down to the floor until I’m next to her with my back against the wall. “I thought it would help.” My head falls in my hands as I rake my fingers through my hair.
“Hey.” Sam’s voice is gentle as she turns to kneel in front of me. “You’re one of the best people I know. I feel so stupid sometimes.” I lift my head, to see what she means, and she adds, “For messing up what we had.”
I force out a laugh. There was a long time that I would have given anything to hear those words, but now that she’s saying them, I feel nothing. She’s not the cause of my pain anymore. I need to shut down my feelings for Claire. I only reconnected with her a few days ago. She shouldn’t have this much power over me.
But then again, Claire has always had too much power over me. That’s why I avoided her when I was seventeen, and that’s why I should have avoided her again when she walked into that bar.
“It doesn’t matter,” I say when I realize I still haven’t answered Sam.
She holds my face in her hands, and I’m too drained to pull away from her. “It does matter,” she says. “I was so terrible to you, and you didn’t even tell anyone. You didn’t have to do that. I owe you, and I want to help you.”
Looking into her eyes, I’m hit with a strange feeling. She’s so familiar to me but so foreign at the same time. Her hands are uncomfortable on my face, and I don’t want her this close to me. I’d rather have this conversation with Em. I’d rather have Claire come back here and make me feel like shit some more. Hell, I’d rather Chad be the one talking to me on this balcony, but too much has happened today, and there’s nothing left in me to let me care.
So when she presses her lips against mine, I don’t bother telling her to stop.
66
Claire
