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The giddiness that she'd met me with when I stopped by her daycare center in town for a quick visit evaporates, quickly replaced with confusion.
"What?" I ask. It's not like Mesa's youngest sibling to keep her thoughts to herself.
Once she's got the young boy separated from the fist-full of magic markers he was running with, she gives me a thoughtful look as if she's deciding what kind of mood I'm in. Then she shrugs nonchalantly.
I feel like I missed a memo.
"Nothing, I just expected...." Her eyes drift toward my hand again. "Because Meadow and Oz had made plans for Mesa to....but then we thought maybe he wanted to do it in private instead but..."
Yeah, I am definitely not up to date on something here.
I follow Terra through the center, back to the main room where a few older children are watching a movie together.
For only being twenty years old, she's got a good head on her shoulders. She started baby-sitting when she was still in high school and, instead of spending her money on clothes or a car like most teenagers, she saved up to start a proper day care center when she graduated.
It took her a while after finishing school to find a space and get some certificates she needed, but now here she is, running her own business like the girl boss she was born to be.
Seriously, Mesa's baby sister is the kind of “down with the patriarchy," rebel, bad-ass I could only dream of being despite her absolute love for kids and her insistence that she's going to have at least as many as her own parents did.
If she ever finds a boyfriend who's secure enough to handle living in her shadow, that is.
"Tare, what are you talking about?"
After I hand off the baby off to Zephyr Hart-- Terra's bestie and part time help at the day care, I follow Terra into the kitchen area where I have her cornered.
"I mean, it's not like a surprise, right?" I don't know if I'm actually expected to answer that. "You knew my brother was going to propose, right? Like, that's something you guys already talked about, right?"
I can feel my face blanching, the edges of my vision blurring slightly as I fight the tears that suddenly threaten to spring up.
"Oh shit." I hear Terra mumbling something about being an idiot but I'm too busy putting together bits and pieces of information from the last few days to pay attention to her.
"Robin? Are you okay? I didn't mean to ruin the surprise, I'm sorry."
Terra slides a glass of juice in front of me as I plop into one of the not-exactly-adult-size chairs at the table in the kitchen area.
We had been talking about marriage. For months, actually. It was never even a question of if, only a matter of when.
It's not so much that I'd been expecting him to propose at Meadow's wedding, but since that night, Mesa's mood has definitely changed.
He's been deep in his own head like he was when he was still in the hospital, pushing me away again, and he hasn't wanted to make love. He's been blaming the nerve damage and saying his leg is bothering him more and last night, he suggested that I might be more comfortable in the spare bedroom.
"I just thought it was his injuries," I explain. "He's had some ups and downs before; I figured it would pass. I understand there's more to his healing than just his body but...what if he changed his mind about us? What do I do then?"
Terra pulls another few tissues from the box and hands them over to me, her face a combination of sympathy and anger.
"My brother is fucking asshole," she mutters not-quite under her breath. "I'm sorry all I have is juice."
"It would be weird if a daycare had something stronger." I joke through the sudden tears.
"You should talk to him, Robin," she closes her hand over mine. "Mesa's always been an ass but he's a good guy. And once he sets his mind on something, he goes all in. He's been all-in with you since before he got hurt. Something weird is going on with him."
Mesa
It's been three days since the wedding, and I know I've been acting like an asshole around Robin.
If I were any kind of man at all, I'd sit her down and come clean with her. I'd tell her what I decided and I'd help her pack her things and move back to the valley.
Instead, I've been moping around the house, making excuses not to get too close to her, blaming my fucking leg and hating myself while I lose sleep with her not beside me at night.
