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“Well, I really do hope you two have a good time, okay?”
“All right. But if you change your mind, call me.”
“Will do, brother. Love you.”
“Back at you,” Ian replied before hanging up.
Zander tucked the phone into his pocket and sat for a while, staring out into Central Park. When he’d moved to New York City, he’d been a man filled with a zest for life, ready to explore and be adventurous. He wanted to live somewhere where excitement reigned supreme and leave all of the stuff from his past behind. He’d pictured his life as this exciting montage of scenes from a movie—sexy bars, wild times, and a whole lot of new things. He thought this would be the perfect place to reinvent Zander Riley and to get a little bit closer to the life he’d once imagined for himself. He wanted to reclaim the life Sheila had shredded right before his eyes.
But here he sat, his back sweaty from a jog in Central Park, thinking about how off the mark he’d been. His brother was out there exploring and chasing his dreams. And Zander was, too, wasn’t he? He had become a teacher. He had a steady job he loved, a simple but nice apartment, and a group of friends who were there when he needed them. He’d built a life of stability despite the fallout from his breakup with Sheila. He’d salvaged from the wreckage of his life a semblance of his dream.
But as he stared at the blue sky, the sounds of the city around him, he felt… empty. Alone. Disappointed.
He knew he couldn’t compare what he had to Ian. They’d chased different dreams, different lives. He wouldn’t want his brother’s life. Still, Ian was making memories and living life to the fullest. He was chasing adventure and variety and fun.
As Zander peeled himself off the bench and jogged home, ready to dive into the shower and a dozen hot wings from the local food cart, he knew he couldn’t say the same thing. In fact, as he looked around his apartment, empty except for Jon Snow and a television show that could barely keep his attention, he started to wonder if, in fact, there was a whole lot missing after all and he just hadn’t been willing to admit it.
