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“Yes. I’m physically ill.”
We laugh, readjusting in our spots to get comfortable. I guess we’re sleeping together. Like a girl’s night. A sleepover. An empty feeling stabs through my sternum, giving me the urge to cry.
“What’s your face doing?” Ruth asks me.
I shrug. “This is my first sleepover.”
“Really?” Skylenna opens her eyes.
I nod.
Skylenna glances at Ruth with a knowing smile. “If it’s going to be a true sleepover…you have to tell us your boy gossip. How did it go with Niles?”
“Unless it’s super sexual and graphic.” Ruth holds up her hands. “He’s like our brother. So you may want to leave those details out.”
“He is our brother,” Skylenna corrects.
A giddy feeling swarms my stomach. “We kissed.”
“On the mouth? Or between the cheeks like Ruth?” Skylenna raises her eyebrows, and we all laugh.
“On the mouth. It was really… special.”
“You’re blushing.” Ruth points to my face. “Do you like Niles?”
I didn’t realize it before, but my cheeks are warm to the touch as if I’ve fallen asleep by a roaring fireplace. My mouth opens, then closes.
“You don’t have to tell us,” Skylenna offers sleepily.
“The hell you don’t! Marilynn, in order for this to be a successful girl’s night, you must give us the naked truth.” Ruth scoots closer, burning holes in my eyes with the intensity of her stare.
“Uh—promise you won’t tell him?” I suddenly feel bare, exposed, nervous beyond reason.
They both nod.
“I get really nervous around him.” And that’s a fraction of the truth.
“Oh my god,” Ruth gasps into her hand. “She has a crush on Niles!”
“I heard my name!” Niles whips his head to us.
My eyes bulge out of my face.
“No, you didn’t!” Ruth fires back.
Skylenna snickers. “Warrose is right, Ruth. You do have a big fucking mouth.”
“Has Niles said anything to you two about me?” I ask in a whisper. Do I even want to know? Will it make a difference? It shouldn’t. It shouldn’t. It shouldn’t.
“We haven’t had much time for girl talk with Niles,” Skylenna explains quietly.
“But we can ask him! He has a big fucking mouth, too. I guarantee he’ll spill his guts about the whole thing!” Ruth claps to herself, grinning ear to ear.
“No!” I half explode. “I don’t want him to think I sent you two.”
“He won’t. Niles used to see himself as Cupid when I met him in the asylum. He loves conversations about love and relationships. We won’t give anything away,” Skylenna promises.
“Oh, this is going to be so much fun! Can you imagine? Our little Niles getting a girl?” Ruth swoons, grabbing my hand and doing a little happy dance.
