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“Yes.”
“God gifted you with a family that would die for you. That would burn for you. That would hold your broken body in their arms all night to keep you alive. That would lose their legs for you. That would follow you into hell with no promise to ever make it out again. They have. They will keep fighting for you, just as you will change the world for them.”
I have been so absorbed in my own faults; I haven’t simply taken the time to appreciate my family for what they’ve done for me. Ruth deserves my love and presence while she recovers. She deserves me to help her get the hell out of here.
“Why am I suddenly able to see you?” I ask quietly.
“You’ve always been able to. We’re told we can’t at a young age, so our brains form that boundary. Experiencing something so horrific as what happened to Ruth broke that limit for you. The same way losing Dessin and Kane broke a limitation in your mind to access the void. Each trauma that leaves a scar on your soul allows you to surpass a new barrier. That’s how you’re able to perform these impossible wonders.” She wipes my tears away with the back of her hand. “And now, after this terrible tragedy…you can see those who have died.”
“Will I be able to see you again?”
“All you have to do is pray to me, and I’ll come.”
I smile against the violent gusts.
Scarlett turns me around to face her. “But Skylenna, you don’t have much time left here. Use your gifts. Dig deeper. You and Dessin have the power of all the warrior angels that have come before you.”
We embrace with a long sigh, holding each other close like I would in a dream. As if I’ll never see her again. But at least now, I know I will. She’s always with me. I’ll find strength in that, even through the darkest of times to come.
As I walk to the big red door, I turn my head to see my Scarlett has dissolved into thin air. Gone with the clouds. Back where she belongs, at home, in heaven.
I reach my hand down to touch the iron doorknob, not even adding pressure, as the door snaps open, blasting wide so fast I have to jump back.
Dessin comes to a panting halt in front of me. Sweat-slicked chest, eyes alert and wild, with hands balling into fists.
“No…” he grunts, taking a cautious step toward me. “I didn’t want to find you up here.”
I stand my ground but am left speechless at his expression. His darkened gaze fills with tears as he takes me in. One fist rises to meet his mouth like he’s doing everything he can to hold in a breakdown.
“Skylenna,” he chokes out, struggling to catch his breath.
“I’m okay,” I blurt out. “See?” I quickly pat my body to show that I’m unharmed.
But it doesn’t matter. I’m up here. I’m in the Bird’s Nest.
“Youthought about it. You were going to leave me, weren’t you?”
I flinch at the first sign of real insecurity in his tone. Of real heartbreak.
I scramble to explain my lapse in sanity. “Seeing what happened to Ruth…I lost my mind, Dessin. I could have stopped it. I fucked up, and I thought everyone would be better off without me. It was a moment of true insanity.”
He turns away from me, hiding his face, either in anger or because he doesn’t want to show weakness. And it feels like someone has ripped out my soul and stomped on it.
“Dessin, I didn’t do it.” My bottom lip quivers, seeing him so torn up. “I love you, and I won’t leave you. I won’t ever leave you.”
He spins back to look at me incredulously. “I don’t think you understand. If I ever lost you, I wouldn’t last the week. There are no alters my brain could split off to bear that kind of pain. There’s nothing my mind could do to protect itself from that loss. I would simply stop breathing and find you again in the afterlife.”
“Oh, Dessin…” My voice breaks, and I throw myself against him, roping my arms around his neck, feeling the way his warm frame tightens around me. He shudders as my breath grazes the space between his shoulder and neck. “I’m sorry. I love you. I love you so much.”
“Don’t scare me like that again, baby.”
“I promise I won’t.”
He pushes me away only to crash his lips over mine, opening his mouth until I’m breathing his air, tasting his hot tongue gliding across my bottom lip. He breaks the connection, giving me fast, aggressive kisses on my lips, cheeks, forehead, jaw. I sigh against him, smiling through tears at the smoky sky.
“Scarlett made it to heaven,” I say as he stops to look into my eyes.
“Come again?”
