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“Goats okay?” I ask, and she cuts her eyes to me as she nibbles on her bottom lip. Is she worried? Scared? Trying not to say something? I’m not sure, which I don’t like. Shay’s not just an open book. She usually shouts her thoughts and feelings from the nearest rooftop at rock concert levels. And yet, she’s giving me nothing.
She pulls up with the slightest slide on the dry grass and then looks at me, not moving. I’ve already got one leg out of the Gator, ready to run at whatever she needs me to handle. Her hand on my arm stops me. “Bruce?”
“Yeah?” I say, scanning the night and then visually checking in with Shay and Allyson in the back seat. Nothing seems amiss, which adds to my confusion.
“You’ve been real busy this week planning the campout for those kids.”
“Uh-huh,” I grunt as a semi-answer, getting out and standing so I can get a better view of the black land around us.
“I know you two ain’t had but a minute alone all week.”
I face Shayanne fully, turning and putting my hands on my hips. “You keeping tabs on me now?”
She smirks, the first sign that she’s up to something. “I can see that itchiness on you. Felt it myself when Luke and I were sneaking around and I missed him. You looked out for me then, and I thought it seemed like a fine time to return the favor. So get out.” She says the last part of that to Allyson.
Allyson balks, interrupting the conversation for the first time. “What? I thought something was wrong?”
Shayanne’s smile is sweet as pie, innocent as an angel. I know she’s neither. “What’s wrong is that my brother is head over fucking heels for you and needs a little alone time with his woman. Now, I’m driving the Gator to my house. I’d suggest you two head on into the barn, or up to the main house, or wherever it is you like to do whatever it is you like to do.” Shay looks at me thoughtfully, one brow raised. “And then you can walk back to the campout having handled whatever it is you need to handle. Talk, fuck, I don’t care.”
With that, she shrugs and revs the engine.
I’m surprised, but then again, I’m not. This is exactly something Shay would do, a little crazy but nice at the same time. I guess I’m mostly surprised she knew I was itching to sweep Allyson away. Am I that transparent? My brother’s earlier assurances that I am come back to mind.
I take Al’s hand, helping her out. As soon as she’s barely clear, Shay throws up a two-fingered wave. “Later, lovebirds. Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do. ’Course with Luke, that ain’t much.”
“That doesn’t leave much off the table, does it?” I growl. I know Luke ain’t responsible for all of it, but Shay’s giving me details I do not want to know.
She laughs, taking off into the night.
Allyson sighs, a blissfully happy sound, and then laughs. “Your sister is something else. I remember her being young and a bit of a tomboy. But I get the feeling she’s grown up a lot since then.”
I squeeze the bridge of my nose between my thumb and index finger. “You have no idea. But she’s not wrong.”
I peek over at Al. She looks beautiful in the moonlight. Hair in a messy ponytail, not a stitch of makeup on, and wearing the sweats and a baggy T-shirt she planned to sleep in. I’ve seen her dressed to impress for work, I’ve seen her in workout gear ready to do drills along with the boys, but this? This dressed-down version of her feels like a private look at the woman beneath the face she presents the rest of the world. It feels like walls crumbling and fronts falling, and it’s just us, here in the night.
“Want to go in the barn or to the house?” Allyson says quietly, almost like she’s going shy on me. I know she feels my intention, the promise of what I’m going to do to her in the air between us. Because fuck, do I need her.
I consider the options and weigh the advantages and disadvantages. “Can I tell you a secret?” I don’t want to, but if I’m demanding that she let me in, I’ve got to do the same. Lead by example, just like with the kids. She nods, and I will my stomach to stop turning. “When we were kids, I dreamed about having you in my room, in my bed. I wanted you in my space, like you were mine.”
“And now?” She already heard the ‘but’ coming.
“But now, I guess I’m kinda ashamed that I’m a grown-ass man still sleeping in the same bed I had as a teenager. I barely fit in the damn thing diagonally.” My laugh is sardonic and hard. I never really considered that I live at home because I never considered bringing anyone here. It’s home, but it’s mostly just a place to crash between days working. The few women I’ve been with have been at their place so I could make an exit when I needed to. I never wanted to bring anyone here but Allyson, and now that I have the chance, I don’t want to.
