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I shake my head, because there’s no way I would be caught dead in something like that. I don’t see how anyone could wear something so uncomfortable looking.
“What about this one?” Anna holds up a black lace nightie that has tiny rhinestones all over it. On the bust between the cups is a pink bow. The panties that are attached to it also have rhinestones. It’s actually really cute. Not something I would be brave enough to wear, but I bet it would look good on Anna.
“I really like that one. You should get it. Nick will definitely thank you for it.”
She eyes the slip of material for another minute and then settles it over her arm. “Hmm… maybe.”
“Do you know how long Nick will be gone this time?” I pick up another number and immediately put it back down, blushing as I do so.
“A week, maybe two.” I see a frown line appear on her brow. It must be terrible to watch the one you love leave time after time. I’ll have to make sure she has plenty to do while he’s gone. Anything to distract her.
“So, I noticed that you and my brother are spending more and more time together. Y’all seem to be getting close.” I know she’s trying to change the subject. I let it go because I don’t want to dampen our outing with sad thoughts.
“We are actually, but I don’t know if I can let him get too close. I’ve got too much baggage, and I don’t want to drag him down.” Even though it’s getting easier to talk about things, I still never reveal too much.
She looks at me with sympathy in her eyes. “It’s okay to let him in, Bailey. I may not know the details, but I know you’ve had a rough life. Let him, and us, try and help you. Believe it or not, Jaxon’s life hasn’t been a walk in the park either.”
I frown. It’s getting harder and harder to resist telling Jaxon about my problems, to resist letting him help me. Right as I decide to tell him, I remind myself that there’s nothing he can do and all that’ll happen is him getting hurt.
“You don’t understand, Anna. There’s nothing he can do. There’s nothing anyone can do. He’ll only end up getting hurt.”
“Has Jaxon told you about Kaylee yet?” she asks me.
I’ve learned a lot about Jaxon over the last several weeks, but I don’t ever remember him mentioning a person named Kaylee.
“No.”
“It’s not my place to tell you about her. He’ll tell you when he’s ready. But know this, Jaxon has a lot of pull in this town. You don’t give him the credit he deserves.”
I look at her and see sorrow in her eyes. Now, I’m curious as to what the story is behind this Kaylee person.
“He told me about your dad. I’m really sorry,” I tell her softly.
The sorrow I saw a minute ago is quickly replaced by anger. The transformation is stunning. I wouldn’t be surprised if snakes popped out all over her head. Obviously, and with good reason, the subject of her dad is very touchy and still enrages her.
“That son of a bitch can burn in the deepest bowels of hell for all I care. And he can take that skank with him. Yes, it hurt Mia and me, but what those two did almost destroyed Jaxon. It changed him, made him jaded. Since that bitch did what she did, he’s never stayed with any one woman more than a week or two. Until you. You bring out the protective, caring, and vulnerable side in him. He cares for you deeply, Bailey. Please don’t hurt him.” By the time she ends her rant, the heat has left her eyes. Now, all I see is earnestness, like she’s begging me. She has no idea that I would give almost anything to not hurt Jaxon.
Not knowing what to say, I just nod.
“Alrighty, enough with the heavy. I’ve decided that this is the outfit that I’m going to wear to rock Nick’s world.” She holds up the black nightie with the rhinestones.
“He won’t know what hit him.” I smile back at her.
“I’m going to go pay and then we’ll stop and get some ice cream before we head back. Are you sure you don’t want to get anything in here?”
I mentally shudder at the thought of wearing any of these outfits. “No, I’m good. You go pay.”
She turns around and flounces off the way only Anna can. I chuckle at her excitement to get back to Nick and rock his world.
My laugh soon dies when I think about what Anna told me today. As much as I don’t want to hurt Jaxon, I know that eventually I will. I don’t know how deep his feelings for me run, but for some reason both Anna and Andrew think his feelings are pretty strong. If what they say is true, when I leave it’s bound to hurt him. I may not be aborting his baby—I swallow at the thought—or leaving with another man, much less his father, but I know that it’ll hurt regardless.
Of course, it’s going to almost kill me to leave him. I don’t know if what I’m feeling for him is love or not, my experience in that department is seriously lacking, but I do know that what I’m feeling is so much more than I’ve ever felt before. Even the thought of leaving sends a sharp pain in the area where my heart is.
13
I’M A TOTAL WRECK. Today is the day I meet Jaxon’s mom. From what I gather, Anna, Nick, and Mia will be there too. His gram couldn’t make it because she’s needed at the diner. He said his aunt, uncle, and cousins might be stopping by as well. I don’t know if it’s normal for his aunt, uncle, and cousins to attend the family dinners every week or if it’s because Jaxon has never brought any girls there before, except Cara of course. Either way, just knowing I’m going to meet his mom is making me jittery.
What does someone wear to things like this? Steven’s parents were both dead when we met, and he had no other family. This is new territory to me. Of course, my clothing selection is very limited, and what I do have is nothing to write home about. My wardrobe consists of mostly jeans and t-shirts. Not very impressive. Ugh! I knew I should have bought something at the mall the other day!
