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“I know you are.” His smile is playful. “And I’m having fun deflecting you.”
“Well, cut it out.” I sit up on an elbow and glare at him. “You’ve done a lot for me and my family, and I can’t really think of a way to do anything for you and yours. So I’m telling you right now, I love you, even though you’re an absolute monster and a pervert, and I’m here for you no matter what.”
“You’ll do anything for me? Is that what you’re saying?”
I resist the urge to roll my eyes. “Don’t make this dirty.”
“You’ll let me fuck your pretty little ass then?”
I let out a snort. “How are you shifting this very nice conversation to anal?”
“Just testing your boundaries.”
I stare at him in the eyes. He’s smirking at me, and I smile right back.
“Saul, if you want to fuck my tight, virgin asshole, all you have to do is ask.”
Which makes his smirk fade. “Really?”
“Really. Except, oh, man, sorry, I don’t do anal with dickheads that can’t be serious for once.”
“I can be serious.”
“Nope, sorry.” I slip out of bed. I like the way he’s staring at my ass with a hungry look. “How about you go visit your brother. Then I’ll happily let you do whatever you want with me.”
“You’re an infernal she-demon.”
“And you’re a stubborn moron.”
“We have a lot in common.”
“Prick!”
“Love you.”
“Call your brother.” I blow him a kiss. “And come join me in the shower.”
He stretches and sighs. “I can do one of those things.”
I hurry away, laughing as he chases after me.
Chapter 34
Saul
The Vegas outfit nearly falls apart.
It doesn’t happen right away. The moment I’m excommunicated by Renzo, I lose about half my staff; the other half weren’t technically Rossi Famiglia members. I scramble to fill their roles, which isn’t easy working remotely, while shoring up the loyalty of everyone that’s left. But things aren’t the same after the mass exodus, and the gambling income slows from a full-on tidal wave to something more like an aggressive flood.
Gian and Carlo call and visit over the next few weeks. I meet them out for drinks a few times, but there’s a barrier between us. I can tell they want to talk Famiglia business, except they can’t when I’m around. It goes against their oaths of silence, speaking of the organization with anyone that isn’t on the inside.
And I’m not on the inside anymore.
It kills me. I try to hide it, but Molly can tell. She goes out of her way to make me feel good every day—which includes a lot of very raunchy sex, some of it extremely creative, that I appreciate—but when I’m left alone in the middle of the afternoon running the gambling books and trying to keep busy, I find myself thinking about my place in the world.
I defined myself by the Rossi name. I was Saul Rossi, brother of the Don, son of the former Don, underboss and loyal servant. I feel lost without those things, and trying to find a new place for myself isn’t easy. Molly’s trying to help but she can only do so much.
Once, Maddie comes for a visit and brings Brando. She talks with Molly while I play with the little guy, and it’s absolutely great, at least until it’s time to leave. “Mommy, when’s Uncle Saul coming back over? Uncle Saul, I miss you.” I hugged the little asshole and ruffled his hair and told him I’d be over soon, but he cried when his mother made him leave, and I haven’t been able to get that moment out of my head.
