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He does?
“How could you know that? I’ve never brought him up before.”
“I can see it in your eyes right when I think you’re about to give me a shot. I can feel it when we start getting closer, and you pull away."
The brightness in his eyes dims a little.
“I’m meeting him tomorrow to find out if there’s something between us and I think it’s only fair that I tell you.”
I see his Adam’s apple bob as he swallows hard.
I know I’m crushing him.
There was a time that I would have reviled in making him hurt to get back at him for what he did to me, but so much has changed now.
“Is there anything I can do to convince you not to see him and give me a chance instead?”
I shake my head.
“I can’t wonder, “what if” for the rest of my life. I have to meet him to know for sure.”
“Then, can I ask for one thing?”
“What is it?”
“Can I have you one last time? We can use a condom,” he says, his hand coming up to glide over my jaw. “No more pregnancy scares, just one last time and then I won’t fight you anymore. I’ll let you go. I want you to be happy, and though I've tried, I know I'm not the one you want."
Tears begin to well in my eyes but I won’t let them fall. I’m the one making the decision to give Win a shot over Slade because he's not the wild hockey player. I don’t get to cry over it.
I know I shouldn’t agree to this.
Giving into what I want too… one last time.
I nod and Slade steps in closer, his hands lifting and coming along either of my neck, the ends of his fingers lacing through my hair. He pulls me in as his lips drop down against mine.
There’s something so different about this kiss. It’s not the rushed, angsty kisses of our last few times together.
Slade’s taking his time.
We’re not in danger of being caught in my bedroom and this isn’t a scratch that we’re both trying to itch.
This is the last time.
The one I want to remember.
The what-if that will never be, but at least this once, Slade and I have come to an understanding.
I kiss him back, gripping his shirt as I pull myself closer to him, pressing my breast against his chest. He takes a step forward, guiding me back until my ass hits the bathroom countertop as he presses himself against me harder.
I dip my tongue into his mouth and his chest rumbles against mine in a growl.
I want to pretend that his body against mine has no effect, but my dampening panties tell another story.
My body tingles everywhere that his touches mine. I've never felt this physical need for someone like I need Slade.
I reach my arms around his neck and that's the moment that he pulls me up his body.
This isn't going to turn into just a goodbye. This will be the night that I'll never forget… with the man I chose to give up.
