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“I don’t know what to do for the best. I’m suffocating with everything rattling around my head. I can’t think straight.”
“Let’s clear some things up for you. Why don’t you tell me what’s concerning you the most?”
“Damien thinks Kally and I should get counseling.”
“It might not be a bad idea, son.”
Clark sits up at my words and looks at a spot on the wall. “What if we can’t get past this? What if I’m kidding myself? I don’t think I can lose her again, Jared.”
“One thing I know for sure, Kally will always have a place for you in her heart, but the poor girl hasn’t had time to process everything that’s happened. Let’s get the funeral over with on Friday first. Everything is bleak now, and I don’t think that will change until Colton gets locked behind bars for the rest of his life.”
“And if he doesn’t? Get locked up, I mean.”
I shrug. “Then we’ll cross that bridge if we come to it. Look, it’s early days. Emotions are running high. Things are going to be said that aren’t meant. You just need to let it go.”
“How do you know so much about this stuff?”
I swing my legs off the bed and sit beside Clark. I haven’t shared much about myself with anyone, but Clark is like a son to me. He’s probably the closest I will ever get to a son. I need to share some of my life with him.
“I’ve been where Kally is now. I lost a child. I didn’t get to grieve. I didn’t even get to say goodbye. I was in Iraq. By the time news got to me, I’d lost the two most precious things in my life. My fiancée and my unborn child. One second they were there and the next… gone.”
Clark turns onto his side to face me. “Jared, I’m so sorry, man. I had no idea. Is that why you left the army?”
“I got discharged ten weeks after they died. I was fearless at that point. I didn’t care about my wellbeing. I was careless and got shot in the chest. I nearly died, but it was like an epiphany, you know? I knew at that point I was wasting my life. I was discharged and started working for your parents within two weeks of leaving the hospital. Running around after you and Damien was what got me through the darkest days; the first anniversary of their death, our engagement, our anniversary. It was your smiling faces that did it for me. Now look at you.” I nudge his arm playfully.
“I wish you had told us. Does anyone know?”
“Nancy knows most of my life story.” I shrug like it’s no big deal. “She has a way of getting things out of me.”
“Of course she does.” Clark shakes his head and smiles weakly. “Stop wasting precious time, Jared. Life’s too short. Don’t leave it until it’s too late. Why stop yourself from enjoying the next… thirty or forty years with the woman you love?”
“Wise words, son.”
“Yeah, I’m full of wisdom for other people. Just don’t let too much time pass by before you tell her how you feel.” He stands up and squeezes my shoulder.
“Noted. And, if you need anything, you know where to find me. My door is always open.”
“Thanks, Jared. Just don’t let me fall apart. Kick my ass if you see that happen. I don’t want to turn into my family.”
“With pleasure.” I wink at him, and he leaves my room without looking back.
I sigh with relief. It’s a big weight off my shoulders telling Clark a little about my life. Talking helps, and I just hope that Kally and Clark do the same. They’ve both lost so much already. They need to focus on their future when the time is right.
Chapter 13
Kally
I don’t know how long I’ve been sitting on this cuddle chair in my room. I don’t have much energy for anything, and it’s nothing to do with feeling ill. I’m just physically and emotionally drained. I haven’t seen Clark since last night. I know he’s giving me space, and I know I’m being a bitch. I just can’t help it. My head is all over the place, and when I try to dissect what’s happened, I go into a meltdown, which makes everything worse for us all.
I stand up as quickly as my body will allow me to. I’m still sore and achy, but I think lack of exercise is playing a big part in my slow recovery.
I leave the room and walk towards the soft voices that filter through the house. When I make it to the living room, I find it’s practically filled with several large men. They all turn to look at me when I enter. Damien walks towards me and eases me into the middle of everyone. I’m glad he picked up on my unease. I think if I could return to my room unnoticed, I would. My heart pounds in my chest, my legs are like Jell-O, and sweat coats my brow.
“Kally, these are friends of mine,” Jared says. “This is Clay. I worked with him in the army, but now he owns a security business with his brothers, Caleb,” Caleb steps forward and holds his hand out to me. “And Chris.”
“It’s nice to meet you, Kally. As Jared said, I’m Caleb. We’ve been drafted in to help with security and make sure everything runs smoothly tomorrow. Can I just say how sorry I am to hear about your loss. If we can do anything to help, just let us know.”
I nod. As nervous as I am, I can sense these are good guys. They might be big, but I can see their kindness.
