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Gulping, I choked back my tears, but one escaped. Only one more. While I knew he was right, because I felt the same way, hearing him say it stung. He pressed a thumb to my cheek, erasing it. Exhaling, I nodded unconsciously. Though I wasn't sure why. I wanted him. I needed him. And I was just now realizing it was more than sex for me. I was scared to ask, but I had to know.
“Why?”
Tilting his head, he ran his fingers through my hair, tugging me to his lips, whispering, “Because I want to show you something tonight.”
“What is it?”
“Who I really am.” He grazed my lips with his. “Because if this has to end, I want you to know the real me.”
My eyelashes fluttered as I struggled to understand what he meant.
“I owe it to you,” he breathed.
“You owe me nothing.” That was the last thing I wanted him to feel. I only wanted him to feel great. Making him happy made me happy. It gave me some sort of pleasure knowing I’d made him feel the way he had. And tonight, would be the last night I got the chance, if he even gave me the chance.
Taking my hand, he led me toward the door.
I grabbed my bag off the table as we walked by. “Should I be nervous?”
Opening the door, he allowed me to step into the hallway before him. Digging in my bag, I handed him my keys, and he locked the door.
“Are you going to answer me?”
Draping his arm around my shoulder, he pulled me to his side as we made our way to the elevator. “We’ll see.”
* * *
JAMES
“What are we doing here?” she questioned as we hurried into the back entrance of my office building from the sudden downpour outside.
She’d asked many things on the way here. Who are you really? Are you going to tell me? You’re really in the Mafia, aren’t you? Is that why you carry a gun? I know you’re not going to kill me, so what’s going on? How many people have you killed? The questions fired at me faster than I could’ve answered, even if I played her game.
“I told you I want to show you who I am.”
For so long, I heard the way she spoke about me on the camera’s audio. I ignored it, brushing it off as nothing more than a typical teenage crush on her friend’s father. I used to have a crush on my friend’s mother. Growing up, we had many sleepovers at Jack’s house, and I constantly drooled over Mrs. Thatcher. I’d never much been into younger women, until now.
Maddie’s crush was nothing to take seriously until we’d formed our own friendship and grew closer. And tonight, before we stopped whatever it was, I wanted her to know who I truly was. Inside and out.
I wanted her to see the side of me that I never showed Alicia. The side I wanted to show my wife, but everything repulsed her. The hardest pill to swallow was the realization she and I were never happy. Once I allowed myself to see it all for what it really was, I thought back to our life together over the years. I finally could admit that if it hadn’t been for Elizabeth and Lucas, my life with Alicia would’ve been a complete waste.
The elevator ride to my company’s floor was quiet. She’d given up asking questions. Soon, she’d have the answers. I’d checked the key card history, and no one had accessed the office floor tonight, so we were completely alone.
Entwining my fingers with hers, I escorted her to my office, locking us in. She shifted her weight back and forth before I ushered her over to another door next to an enormous bookcase. I took out a keycard, scanned it, and held it open for her.
She stepped into the dark room. I let the door close automatically behind us, securing itself. She jolted when it clicked. She held both my hand and arm, squeezing a bit tighter.
“Alexa, turn on the vault lights and the playlist.”
Ambient, blue lighting came to life, and a carefully curated dark playlist began low through the surround sound. Ignoring her, I laid the keycard on the table and picked up a remote. Pointing it at the corner of the room, I pushed the button and returned it to the table next to the card. The floor-to-ceiling, black window shades rolled up slowly, allowing minimal exterior light into the room, thanks to the special tint I’d had installed. I meandered to the middle of the room, unbuttoning each cuff of my black shirt, and rolling the sleeves to my elbows.
“What the fuck?!” she finally gasped quietly.
An evil grin tugged at the corner of my lips, pleased with both the shock and curiosity in her tone. I twisted around to face her, narrowing my gaze. Her platinum hair radiated a blue hue in the lighting. Something innocent materialized in her watchful gaze as she surveyed the dark room that I called The Vault to throw my employees off the trail. They assumed it was just my storage room.
In reality, it was a luxurious, modern sex dungeon I’d created but never got to use. In the beginning, I’d always hoped it would be for Alicia and me. Many times, I thought about surprising her until we were watching a movie with a red room scene. She insisted I turn it off. She wanted nothing to do with that life. I’d started exploring that lifestyle in high school with a group of my friends, so I craved to have that kind of life with someone. After she and I fully committed to one another later, I did as she wished to keep peace in my family.
The Vault sat untouched except for the cleaning lady I insisted on signing a non-disclosure agreement before I let her near it. There were times I came here to think, other times to jerk off at the vivid images in my mind. Over the years, I added a bed, chair, restraints, bondage benches, a swing, and many toys for torturous pleasure.
