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Chapter 31
Hudson
Friday
Most days in the office, the beeping of machines faded into the background like one of Jamey’s cartoons. Today, however, I couldn’t help but notice it, beeping incessantly from the next room and pulling me out of every possible thought I tried to hold on to. Normally I’d be thankful for that, especially when my thoughts veered too close to Sophie, to her body, to our child growing inside of her and the reason for that. But I’d rather wade through those mental pictures than hear the incessant beeping.
I clicked through the files on my computer, each click in time with the beeping and checked my schedule for the day: Elizabeth, ten-thirty; Pamela, eleven; Sangah, twelve; Molly, one-thirty.
I had some time before my first appointment of the day. I tapped through my phone, the temptation to message Sophie and ask how she and Jamey were doing gnawing at the back of my mind then being driven away with each stupid fucking beep and opened my emails.
Fuck.
Staring straight back at me was a flight reminder, a forwarded email from Nathan, and a confirmation for my hotel in New York City.
I’d completely fucking forgotten.
All at once, Sophie forgetting to tell her parents about Jamey felt far more believable considering that I’d forgotten about a four-day long conference I was meant to be attending next week. I hadn’t even sorted out childcare. Although I liked to think of myself as a good father, it was times like this that made me reconsider.
I couldn’t ask Sophie. That was far too much to put on her plate, especially with the baby. No, I’d have to ask my mom. Jamey would be upset and Mom might teach him how to make a goddamn mojito or something and would probably leave the maids to watch him like she used to do to me.
I groaned in frustration as I sat forward, resting my head on my hands. I didn’t have the willpower to deal with this. I didn’t want to deal with it, didn’t want to be gone for four days away from Sophie and Jamey. But I needed to go. I’d made a commitment, and I had to stick to it.
————
“I know, I’m sorry,” I sighed, my hands clutched around the leather of my steering wheel. The late afternoon sun beat down on the hood of the Mercedes, nearly blinding me with the reflection as I moved at a snail's pace down I-93. “I didn’t mean to throw this on you last minute. It was an accident.”
“I know, sweetheart, but I’m going to have to cancel some plans. Or maybe your father can watch Jamey for a little bit while I go out with the girls. Either way, I’ll make it work, but some warning next time would be nice.” I could hear the sounds of a knife on a cutting board, cutting through something hard, like an apple or celery.
“Thank you.” I moved what felt like an inch forward in the thick traffic. “I’m going to give Sophie your number if that’s okay. Can you keep an eye on her while I’m gone?”
“Of course, honey. No problem.” The knife slipped, and I heard a sharp intake of air on her end of the call, followed by a little chuckle. “Jeez, I almost cut myself.”
“Thanks, Mom. And be careful with the knife, you know Dad’s much better at chopping.”
————
As I stood outside my front door, I took a deep breath. Would she be upset with me for leaving? She was only in the first trimester, but if something went wrong, if she lost it, I wanted to be there. I wanted to help her through it. But would she even want me there if something happened?
I pushed the door open, the sounds of cartoons and giggles invading my senses, and couldn’t help but smile as I heard Sophie counting down from ten, likely playing a game of hide-and-seek with Jamey. I should have told her the other day. I should have.
“I’m home,” I called out, and Sophie’s counting ceased. Jamey’s little body appeared from behind the curtains on the far side of the room, his eyes lit up with excitement, his smile wide.
“Daddy!”
God, that never got old. Would it still feel as good with two of them?
“Hey, Hudson,” Sophie chimed, stepping around the corner of the living room. Jamey looked up at her with wide eyes.
“This doesn’t count, okay? You haven’t found me yet,” he giggled, tucking himself behind my thighs as if he were still hiding.
“Of course it doesn’t. You’re still winning.”
I ruffled Jamey’s hair as I looked at Sophie. She wore her hair down, the Harvard hoodie back on, not a word said about it as if she’d decided it was well and truly hers now. She looked far too good to be true, and a part of me wished I could just cancel the trip and stay with her and Jamey, keeping her close. “Can I talk to you?” I asked, keeping my voice as soft as I could to keep her from getting worried. “Alone.”
An expression of confusion spread across her face before evening back out. “Uh, sure. Jamey? Why don’t you go back to your cartoons while your dad and I chat?”
Jamey groaned his frustration as he stepped out from around me. “Fine.” His lower lip jutted out in a pout as he walked back to the living room, his hunched back and dangling arms showing just how dramatic he could be.
