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“Wanted to ask you something,” I said, honest. She had her free period right now, so it’d be a good time. “Do you mind? It won’t take long.”
Please say yes.
Her chin lifted, but when she nodded, I said a silent prayer. Together, we headed off, but we didn’t do so alone.
About half a dozen security was in the hall with us, men and women from campus staff yeah, but others too. I recognized the private security firm that was working for our families.
They had probably followed her all the way over to the tech lab.
A lot had changed since Sloane came back, and added security had been one of those things. I was sure she believed it was just for the press, and the families were leading all us kids to believe that too. They wanted to keep us safe and from the prying eyes of the world, but there were also other things here. They still didn’t trust my grandfather, and I knew for a fact they didn’t want him around Sloane or her brother. I’d heard he stepped back and had no plans to interfere in their lives, but that didn’t matter. They didn’t want him around them, me, or any of us, and the short alliance they’d had with him seemed to be one of the past.
I wasn’t in a position to argue with them, nor to find their concerns unfounded. My grandfather very well could be being honest about his role in the Sloane kids’ lives, but I was the last one to give a shit about that. I wanted him away from them too, from her.
Garret and Harrison, two of the families’ security, nodded at Sloane and me. None of the security was supposed to impose on our lives, but that didn’t mean any of them were giving us any privacy.
“You wanted to ask something?” Sloane pretended not to notice, a few paces ahead of me. She had her hands in her hoodie, but she couldn’t not notice when a member of security waved at her. She waved back, pleasant about it, but I could tell it unnerved her. All this shit was a fucking lot.
We rounded a corner. “This security shit is just the parents,” I said, tipping my chin to some of them. “Maybe there won’t be as many when the press lets up.”
I hoped there wouldn’t be, but again, who knew. As far as I knew, my grandfather was still in town, and until he wasn’t, I didn’t think a lot of things were changing.
Sloane acknowledged this, her head bobbing once, but when we cut another corner, I pressed a hand to the wall. This made her stop too, and I got a full blast of those fucking cookies. I didn’t know if she wore that scent in her hair or if it was her damn fabric-softener sheets. I just knew I loved it, would kill for it. “How have you been?” I didn’t mean to ask her that and definitely had no right to ask her that. I tucked my hands in my pockets. “Everything at home with Ramses and Brielle okay?”
I’d been there pretty much every night, but I wasn’t with them every waking moment. I wasn’t supposed to be. They needed their time.
Just breathe. It’s the right thing, right for them and her.
In my own mental headspace, Sloane eased out of the one she shared with me. Her butt touched the wall, her hands behind her. She shrugged. “We’re all adjusting.”
She was like a shell of the person she’d been before she’d left, my little fighter still in there but so far away. I leaned closer, but more security strode through the hall, and she gave me cheek. Motherfuckers.
I backed off then, and the way Sloane’s breath expelled, this seemed to be desired. She crossed her arms. “What do you want, Prinze?”
A dagger couldn’t have cut deeper. She’d definitely sounded like Bru when she said that. “I guess I just wanted to ask your permission about something.” More security came through, and I gave them my back. Just because they weren’t to interfere with our lives didn’t mean they weren’t snitches. Eyes for our parents. I had no intention to keep what I was looking into from them, but I at least wanted to talk to Sloane about it first. I angled in her direction. “I’m asking Thatcher to look into your adoption. Your records specifically.”
“Why?”
“Because there are other people in all this.” My lips turned down. “Lawyers, caseworkers, who knows. I’m sure Godfrey needed help to cover up a kidnapping.”
Her expression pinched at the name, and I hated that shit, that the name held so much power over her. If that prick who had taken her wasn’t dead, I’d kill him myself. “I’m sure he did, but why are you looking into it?”
“Because someone needs to.” My jaw shifted. “Now, I don’t know what the parents are doing, but whatever it is, what I’m doing won’t interfere.” I got close. “I just want your blessing. I’m not going to sneak around, and me looking might not even result in anything.” I forced out a breath. “But if I do find something, I’ll give it to the parents. Anything I find I’ll give to them.”
She said nothing, blinking. She glanced away. “Why are you even asking me? You don’t ask.”
She laughed a little when she said it, a sad, choked laugh. It broke my fucking heart, a million goddamn pieces at our feet. I’d done this shit to her.
I’d done so much shit.
I had once told her we were perfect, that in our flaws we were magic, and she was wrong that we shouldn’t be together. I still believed that, but I was hanging on by a thread. I kept fucking hurting her, and her being in pain was destroying me.
“You do whatever you want,” she said, easing away from me. Her fingertips bunched the sleeves of her oversize hoodie, her head shaking when she walked away.
I took a step. “It wasn’t about you.” She stopped, her head turning, her back straight. I took another step. “Me not telling you about my grandfather? It wasn’t about you. Never was.”
This was the truth, my issues with him and lack of faith in her had nothing to actually do with her. It was something I’d always known, and even if I wasn’t in therapy, it didn’t matter. I always had the answer, and it’d never been her.
I crossed the hallway over to her, coming around. She wouldn’t look at me, but I didn’t fucking care. “My grandfather is a psychopath. He was before I was born, and even if he claims not to be one now, he was back then, and as far as I’m concerned, that’s enough for me to never trust him.”
