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Aspen had seen me like this.
The shakes hit my limbs again. I was on the verge of throwing up once more, but from the far-off spaces in my mind, I heard voices. There were two voices suddenly in the bathroom with Wells and me.
“What’s going on? Noa and I heard yelling.”
My eyes shut tighter, my best friend Dorian’s voice in the room. The other voice had been his girlfriend, Noa Sloane-Mallick, and as soon as I opened my eyes, I cringed. Sloane had her hand to her mouth, and Dorian had his hand on her.
“Go get Wolf,” Dorian urged her. Wolf was her twin, and the two looked similar. They were both tall and looked like Latin models with tanned skin and flowing dark hair. I supposed they both were Latin and Middle Eastern and white.
I couldn’t even look at Dorian when he came over. He was blond too, but it was natural.
I should be stronger than this shit.
I should have been, and I didn’t want Sloane to see me like this. I didn’t want anyone to see me like this, but especially my buddies’ girlfriends. Wolf had one too, and I saw Fawn when she entered the bathroom with Wolf.
She was his fiancée now, a redhead with tattoos. Wolf had some too, but not as many as her. The two had recently gotten engaged, and she had moved into our house. I shared one with my friends, and Dorian had been pissed about the engagement. He was happy as shit for Wolf. We all were, but Dorian was in his feelings that Wolf had gotten the jump on him. It was common knowledge Dorian wanted to propose to Sloane, and he had his back up about not being able to propose first.
I had a feeling neither of my friends were thinking about that now, that beef. They weren’t with me on the fucking floor like a little bitch.
Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.
I couldn’t stop fucking shaking, and I couldn’t let go of Wells. I kept hearing that goddamn music. I kept hearing it…
“Hey.” Wolf had his hands on my shoulders. His real name was Ares, but we called him Wolf because he played like a beast on the football field.
I didn’t know how all of us were in this tiny-ass bathroom. I barely fit in here, but Wells, Dorian, and Wolf managed to get in. Dorian was wide like me, and Wolf was goddamn tall. He was closer to seven feet than six.
Wolf braced my shoulders. “Look at me, buddy. Okay?”
Dorian knew to get Wolf. Hell, Wells had too, but I hadn’t let him.
“Ares…” I cringed again, rocking, and I heard whispers. Sloane said something to Fawn by the door, and shortly after, they both left. They both thought it best, leaving us guys, and they said that.
I cringed once more, buckling over like a little fucking bitch. I should be able to deal with this, handle this.
She saw me like this.
I shouldn’t fucking care. Who the fuck was Aspen Davis to me anyway? But I didn’t like anyone seeing me like this. Weak…
“Thatcher?” Wolf urged, physically making me look at him. I ended up releasing my hold on Wells only to grip Wolf instead.
The music. That fucking music.
“Make it stop, man,” I called out, that shit drumming in my head. I was tearing Wolf’s clothes now, his sweatshirt. “Make the music stop, please.”
“You’re hearing the music again?” Wolf questioned, his voice calm, steady. It always was when I had these panic attacks, which was why the others had wanted to call him. He knew how to deal with these because he had them sometimes. “It’s in your head again?”
I nodded, shutting my eyes.
Wolf gripped my arm. “You listen to me, okay? You’re here in this room. You’re here with us. You’re safe. You are because you’re here with us guys. Your boys.”
My eyes shut tighter.
“You’re safe, man. I swear,” Wolf continued. “You’re with us guys. You’re okay.”
I knew that, and though I wanted to be here in the present, it was hard. This shit didn’t easily stop when I was trapped in the sea of the moment. I got lost in it. So fucking lost.
Even still, my friends attempted to help me. Dorian put a hand on my shoulder, and I felt another on my back. Wells ended up hugging me from behind, and they all put me in a cocoon.
