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It’s another wish of hers that I take as a command. I should probably ask her if she’s sure. If being alone with me is what she really wants. But I don’t have it in me to risk having her say no. I probably don’t have it in me to listen if she does say it. But I’ll cross that bridge when we get to it.
22
Ariel
I don’t remember ever being as scared as I was walking into that bar. Not even when I was abducted the first time. That was a paralyzing sort of fear, this fear I brought on myself, and it burned like a flame. But Ruin’s hand in mine, the drink and the dancing helped. Seeing him choke that huge guy like it was nothing just for insulting me helped too.
I was fully ready to give myself to him when we left the bar.
Now the cool night air and the darkness are eating away at that certainty. What if I freak out? What if he doesn’t stop if I need him to? What if I hate it and then there will be no going back to the fun we had?
The woods around the shack are pitch black, made worse by the brightness of his headlight, which he leaves on once we arrive. Cold seems to be rising from the ground as well as seeping out of the trees all around us and more and more, this doesn’t seem like such a great idea anymore.
“I’ll get a fire going,” he says and knows just where to find all he needs to start one. From the twigs to the fire-starting cubes and logs to make it rise higher.
“You’ve done this before,” I say once he has a good flame going and I sit next to him beside the fire pit, on a comforter he also procured from somewhere inside the shack.
He’s turned off the headlight and the firelight is making swirls of shadow play across his face. He’s looking at me very intently, his gaze hotter than the flames.
“I’m gonna kiss you now,” he says hoarsely. But it’s a question. I can feel that as clearly as I can the pent up desire he has for me.
“Yes,” I whisper. “And then you’re gonna fuck me.”
I started this night wanting to give myself over to my biggest fears. So there’s no turning back now.
Joker wasn’t wrong. I had been trained well by the Horned Riders. And all that training came back while I danced with Ruin tonight. But something else came too. Desire. For him to do to me everything those men the Riders sold me to did. Only this time I’d like it. I hope that is true.
He doesn’t give me much time for hoping though, before grabbing the back of my head and pulling me in for the deepest, hungriest kiss I’ve ever tasted. The desire I saw in his eyes or the flames of the fire we’re sitting beside have nothing on the intensity of this kiss. Soon it’s like another fire is raging inside me and he built this one too.
He peels off my jacket, his hands cupping my breasts as he deepens the kiss. I help him out of his cut, and have to endure the long seconds while his lips leave mine so he can take off his shirt. His smell is intoxicating just as it was on the dance floor. Leather, smokiness, and this same tangy scent of the redwoods all around us.
I take off my shirt too, then rise so I can strip off my jeans for him. And I don’t stop until I’m standing over him naked, the heat of the flames licking my bare skin. The fire in his eyes is hotter.
I’ve been desired by men before. And it never felt this good.
He takes off the rest of his clothes too, with a breathless urgency that makes me smile. But he wipes that away with another hungry kiss, deeper than the ones before. His hands are touching every inch of me. My ass, my back, my neck, my breasts, my nipples and everything in between.
I’m touching him too. Feeling every nook and cranny, valley, and peak of his muscles, of his many scars. The tattoos on his hands and arms make his skin appear black, but his touch is warm and soft for all its urgency.
I stop him as he tries to lay me down on my back. I don’t know if I can handle being pressed down.
“Sit,” I tell him as he looks at me questioningly, his lips parted and glistening, his breaths jagged.
He does it and I climb in his lap, so his throbbing hard cock is pressing against my pussy. I kind of like being on top. I can handle that. And I know how to move to make them come fast. If they tried to take me lying down, I’d just lie there like a log and get hit in the face for being boring and frigid.
I push all those thoughts as far as I can into the darkness from which they came.
I like the feel of his cock against my wet pussy. I like the thought of it inside me. I like his soft lips on mine. I like the feel of his strong arms holding me as though he never means to let me go.
I like all those things very much. They are the things I should focus on.
So I guide his cock into me, letting him enter me slowly. I gasp as he breaks my resistance. It’s a familiar feeling yet completely new too. And as I slide up and down and gyrate my hips like I could do in my sleep by the time I was saved, the familiar starts to fade and give way to the bliss of the new.
I didn’t know having a cock inside me could feel this good. The few times I did feel something with all those other guys, I ignored it until it went away. No one ever made my whole body quiver like wind touching water the way his cock and his kisses are doing.
I slide on him faster, wanting more of the bliss, wanting more of the pleasure. A moan escapes my mouth because I can’t contain the pleasure anymore. It needs an escape. That’s a first too.
I keep going, savoring every thrust, every moan, every breathless moment when his cock inside me unlocks new doors of bliss.
