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His silence is not what I wanted. Eli stares at me, nearly right through me. He spins his hat from forward to backward on his head. A group of women run past us, between us in fact. I take another step back to give them more room. Eli and I wait for them to move away from hearing our conversation.
He crosses from his side of the path to mine. “You didn’t even blink as they passed.” Eli chuckles silently to himself as he brushes a bit of sweat that has formed on his temple away. “I asked you before not to hurt her.”
“Yes. You did. I can’t promise she won’t get hurt again. What I can promise is that I will love the hell out of her for as long as she’ll let me. I want to be with her. She’s my wing. No one else can take her seat.”
“Well, Mav, if I have to finally give up my seat, at least a Sawyer’s going to take it over.”
“You’re not going to fight me on it?”
“Wes, I see how she looks at you. I’m not stupid. I also know that you’ve never talked about someone like you do about my sister. You have your issues, but I know you love each other. What I do want is for you to get this Hannah situation on a better, more even playing field. I can’t have Hayley thinking she’s less than and hurting herself because of it.”
“Do you think I want her to hurt like that either? I’m going to make damn sure that doesn’t happen again. Everything I do going forward is about her and us. I’m switching firms, I’ve moved, Hannah and I have come to an understanding. Hayley knows everything.”
“Whoa. I’m not trying to play dad in all this. I can’t have two of the most important people in my life in that much pain again and not be able to do a damn thing to fucking help.”
“You did help. You always do. I have things you can do for me.”
“What are they?”
“You can be my best man, be the godfather to my kid, and make sure your dad isn’t going to come after me later for having sex in his house.”
Chapter Thirty
Wes
The last few days have been an absolute whirlwind. I don’t think I’ve ever been so stressed out, yet so happy at the same time. After we broke our news to Eli and Dylan, next on the list was my parents. I don’t think my mother has ever screamed so loud with joy in her life. She bounded up and down like she was on a pogo stick. I thought she might also snap Hayley in half with her hugs.
My father had to wipe a tear away from his face. That was a bit of a shock for me. I think he was processing not only what we told him, but what he missed out on with Michael. I think every milestone I have that thought will be at the back of their minds. Now that I’m staring at the beginning of fatherhood, I get it. It’s not like I didn’t understand before. Just knowing it and feeling it are two different things.
We leave my parents’ house but take a moment in the silence of the car. Hayley’s been doing so remarkably well the last few days. I’m not sure what I expected. She’s been much stronger and more self-assured than I’ve seen her in a long time. I hope that inwardly she knows her place. That place is at my side.
I look over at my girl as we drive to our final destination on this tour. We’re going to visit Hannah together. They’re going to see each other face-to-face for the first time, in a matter of minutes. I’d always assumed when we got to this place, I’d feel an overwhelming sense of anxiety. On the contrary, what I feel is an amazing sense of relief.
Hayley has her head resting on the window in the sun. Her eyes are closed, and her head is bobbing with the movement of the car. Her sense of peace is not only inspiring, but contagious. She’s at the very heart of my peace.
“Hayley? Are you awake?”
“Yes, and I’m happy about it. This sun feels so warm.”
“Before we go into Hannah’s apartment, I’d like us to have a minute alone in the car, if that’s okay.”
Her head rotates toward me, leaving her half in light and half in shadow. “Sure, it’s okay. Is something wrong?”
I don’t answer her question until we’ve found a place to park, and I shut off the car. “I just want to make sure you're one-hundred-percent ready for this. I know we discussed most of how we want things to go with your therapist, but I’d hate myself if I didn’t pulse check one last time.”
My beauty reaches across the console to take my hand. “Wes, I’ve been ready for this for a long time. Don’t worry. I promise you I’m okay.”
I smile at her. She’s stood so tall this week. “Good. My senses are working right. I need to say a few things before we go up there. The first thing I want to say is I love you. I don’t think I’ll ever tire of saying it.”
“Good, because I’ll never tire of hearing it.”
“It’s been so hard to get here, harder than I ever imagined. Every difficult thing has been so worth it. When you left, I had more time than I wanted to think. I did a back in time thing in my head. I thought about all the time we’ve spent together. I like that I can go back to one time when you were seven and I pushed you on the tire swing on the big oak. I like that I was around when you went to your first dance.
“I got to see you graduate from high school and now from college. You, for the most part, have always been by my side, one way or another. You’ve had this insane ability your whole life to ride next to me whether it was in pigtails or a bridesmaid gown. I feel like the luckiest idiot in the world that you said yes. I think it’s past time you have an outward symbol of my commitment to you.”
Hayley
With every word I sit up straighter. I love the smart-ass side of my man, but the knight in shining armor thing is even better. I watch as he pulls a very worn ring box from his pocket. I think I recognize it. Then when he opens it, I’m sure I do.
