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Things between Kyler and I are really great. Despite the fact we’ve only just officially become a couple, we haven’t slipped into that newly-together, honeymoon period most new couples go through, and we’re definitely not “sexing like rabbits” as Nolan not-so-delicately put it. It’s not that we don’t want to—there are times where we absolutely do—I’m just mindful of the fact my brother’s room is just across the hallway to Kyler’s and underneath mine. And, despite the fact Jude’s told me on a number of occasions he’s happy for us, and has given us his blessing, it just feels weird knowing he’s nearby while we’re, well, sexing. Plus, what with the guys’ hockey games and Kyler’s job at the bar, we don’t have the luxury of spending all our time together, and I’m okay with that. We’re still our own person and so not being joined at the hip works well for both of us. But it doesn’t stop Ky from slipping into my bed late at night after he’s finished a shift. And the times he doesn’t? Well, those are the occasions we don’t talk about, because this is where we disagree. He’s still fighting, and I wish he’d stop. He tells me he has to go through with each fight because the money is a promise of a secure future for Lacey. And because Lacey is his priority and I know I’ll lose the argument every time. So, instead, I care for his cuts and bruises as tenderly as I can and hold back my words.
Today, Kyler’s helping his sister with finalizing everything for Lacey’s birthday party at the end of the week, so I’m taking the opportunity to do my own bit of family bonding. Jude and I have barely seen each other recently and it feels like we’re distant relatives rather than close siblings. Like Ky, hockey takes up most of his time, but when he’s not on the ice, he’s also not at home, saying he has plans elsewhere. Whatever they are, they seem to leave my brother closed off. He’s not his usual, happy self and my sibling instinct tells me there’s something on his mind.
He’s already at Cool Beans, the coffee shop on campus, when I arrive and has snagged us one of the cozy sofa areas, so I order our coffees and something to eat. He won’t have time to have lunch later, so I make sure he has something now.
“Hey bro,” I greet him, leaning down to give him a hug which he reciprocates, and hand him his americano and a grilled pastrami and cheese sandwich. “How was class?”
Jude shrugs as he takes a sip, the hot temperature of the drink causing him to wince a little. “Eh, same old. Prof. Donnelly was in an extra grumpy mood today, which is always a joy.”
I feel a little bad for Jude, as Professor Donnelly is the only professor at NU who doesn’t give any leeway to the athletes on our sports teams. While others are more lenient with workloads or deadlines for turning in papers, Donnelly doesn’t give a rat’s ass. As far as he’s concerned, if you take his class, then you’re expected to give one hundred percent commitment to the assignments sent; extra-curricular activities or not.
I take a sip of my oat latte before following up. “His class was a killer, huh?”
“You know it.”
An awkward silence settles between us and Jude takes a bite of his sandwich, seemingly unaware of the stilted conversation. Normally we’d be talking non-stop, or teasing each other, and there’s never been this strange tension between us—I don’t like it at all.
“Is everything all right, Jude?”
Jude takes another bite of his sandwich before responding. “Yeah, why?”
“It’s just that you seem . . . I don’t know, preoccupied, I guess?”
He glances out of the window as if to collect his thoughts, but doesn’t offer an immediate reply, which makes me worry even more.
“You know you can talk to me, right? I know I’ve been a little head-in-the-clouds with Ky, but I’ve always got time for my favorite brother.”
That earns me a small raise of his lips. “Your only brother, you mean.”
“Eh, semantics,” I pause, waiting to see if he offers any more information, but he doesn’t.
“Jude . . .”
“I’m fine, T. I promise. Just the usual juggling of hockey and studying and whatnot. Once I get this econ paper turned in, I’ll be fine.”
“You know it’s all right not to be fine? If you’re struggling with workloads—or anything else for that matter—it’s okay for you to say it and ask for help.”
“I know.”
“And the same goes for anything not work related too. Hobbies . . . love life . . . relationships . . .”
“Okay, you can stop now.” Jude gives me the smile I’ve been looking for since I got here, and I find myself relaxing a little.
“Honestly, I’m okay. A little stressed with this paper, a little hyped about our next game, but that’s it. And, nice try with the love-life digging, but there isn’t anything to tell. But, thanks, Thea, for looking out for me. It means a lot.”
“Of course,” I tell him earnestly. “We’re siblings, right? That’s what we do.”
Instead of agreeing, something catches Jude’s attention behind me and, whatever it is, has him furrowing his brows. I’m about to turn around to take a look but am saved the bother when a familiar voice greets us.
“Hey.”
“Hey man,” Jude answers as Adam comes to a stop beside our table. He’s the last person I expect to see here; firstly, because he’s not a student and secondly, since we broke up, we cut off all contact with each other. So, to say I’m surprised to see him is an understatement, which is evident in my response to him.
“What are you doing here?”
“I . . . er . . . I was going to look for you at the house, but I ran into Saul, I think it was? Anyway, he said Jude was meeting you here, so I tried my luck, and here you are.” To his credit, Adam looks a little sheepish with his admission, but he still hasn’t answered my question.
“Okay, but what are you doing here, in Northport?” I ask again, hoping for a better response.
