Page 97 of Is This Love?


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“I won’t be leaving her side until she walks out of this hospital. I don’t know who I need to pay or what needs to be done to make that happen, but I won’t leave her.”

Doctor Hamilton sighs. “You can stay, but the first time you interfere with her care, I’ll have you removed from the grounds.”

I nod. I’ll bite my tongue and keep my mouth shut as long as she’s being taken care of.

CHAPTER

TWENTY-FOUR

Legend

Finally, we’re alone. After hours of encouragement and their failed attempts to get me to do the same, I convinced her parents and mine to go home to sleep in their own beds for the night, with my promise to call if there are any changes. Our friends have done the same. The lights are off in her room, but there is still a glow from all the machines she’s hooked up to.

I haven’t left her side since they brought me to her room, and I won’t. I don’t leave this hospital until she does. Quietly, I lift my chair, place it closer to the bed, and gently take her hand in mine. Her fingers are still cold, but not like they were before. Her color is better. She doesn’t look as ashen. Her lips and her fingers are still a darker color than they should be, but they are no longer blue.

“You’re making progress, gorgeous,” I tell her. I bend to kiss the back of her hand, mindful of all the tubes and wires. “You scared me today. You’re still scaring me. When I saw you on the bathroom floor, my heart stopped.” I feel the tears start to build, and it’s just me and her in this darkened room, so I don’t bother to stop them. “I need you to open those pretty blue eyes for me, baby. I need to see you.” I kiss her hand again and rest my forehead on the bed. I know that she’s not going to wake up. They have her in a medically induced coma, but if she’s listening, I need her to know I’m here and fighting for her to come back to me.

I’ve never felt that level of fear in my entire life. I never want to experience it again. I lift my head again to watch her. The gentle rise and fall of her chest, even knowing it’s a machine that’s causing it, soothes me. She’s still here. She’s still fighting.

“I can’t live this life without you, Monroe. I know you’re sick, but please, baby. Please fight to come back to me. I need you. We have so many plans. We have that huge house to fill with our babies. We have lots of barbeques to host in our backyard, and we promised we’d grow old together. I’m going to need you to keep that promise.

“I wish I could hold you. If I wasn’t afraid of hurting you or getting kicked out, I’d climb into that bed and pull you into my arms. I’m so sorry I didn’t stay. I knew how sick you were. I should have been there. Fuck, I could have been too late. Five more minutes, and I could have lost you.” Sobs rack my chest as I let my fear wash over me.

I’ve never felt this kind of fear. My mind won’t stop racing. She has to come out of this. She has to be okay. I need her to be okay. We still have so much left to do, so much life left to live together. I close my eyes, resting my head on the bed, holding her hand in mine while trying to stay calm. Eventually, sleep claims me.

The next thing I know, a nurse is in the room with us, switching out her IV bags. “Sorry to wake you,” she whispers.

“How is she?”

“Vitals are good. She’s a fighter.”

I nod. “You hear that, gorgeous? You’re a fighter.” I stand and place a kiss on her forehead before taking a bathroom break. When I come out, the nurse is gone, but there’s a blanket and a pillow laid out on the lounge chair on the opposite side of the bed that weren’t there before.

“I’m right here, baby. I’m going to lie down, but I’m with you, okay? I’m not leaving without you. I love you with everything inside me, Monroe Raines.” I kiss her cheek this time and settle on the lounge chair. It’s uncomfortable, but as exhaustion weighs down on me, I drift off to sleep.

When I wake up the second time, the sun is starting to rise. I sit up, wiping my hands over my face. I check on Monroe, but there doesn’t seem to be any change. She’s still hooked up to these machines that are keeping her alive, with a tube down her throat. There’s a lump in mine, but I swallow it back. I need to be strong for her.

I stand and make my way to the bed.

“Morning, baby.” I kiss her cheek. “Love you,” I murmur as the door to her room opens.

In walks Dr. Hamilton. “Good morning, Legend.”

“Doc,” I greet him.

“I’ve been looking over her vitals from last night. She’s stable, which is a good thing. Later on today, we’re going to do a wean test.”

“What’s that?”

“We’re going to turn down the machine and see how she does with breathing on her own.”

“Is that safe?”

“Yes. It’s a crucial test to gauge how her lungs are healing.” He pulls up the chair and sits. “We got the test results back.”

“And?”

“The toxicology report was negative.”

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