Page 84 of Love to Fear You


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He has the nerve to sit here and cry? To beg for my forgiveness? To play the victim in a situation of his own making?

I look up at Alek, and when our eyes meet, we share a moment where I know exactly what is in his dark heart.

I’ll never be able to get revenge on cancer for taking a mother away from her daughter. That pain will always haunt me.

But here are the two people responsible for my revenge porn video. Alek is offering them to me on an altar, giving me the chance to make them pay for what they’ve done to destroy my life.

This is his gift to me: vengeance.

“What will you do, malishka?” he asks. “What would you do in a world with no consequences, where you can tap into the blackest parts of your soul?”

He releases Chad’s hair with a rough shove and tosses his knife in the air. Catching it by the blade, he extends the handle toward me while Chad begins to sob on the floor between us.

“This is what I’m offering you,” Alek continues. “A world where I can protect you from all the consequences of your dark desires. So, what will you do with it?”

I accept the knife and turn it over in my hand. My fingertips run along the hilt, feeling the matte texture of the heavy metal.

With Alek, everything is possible, and the realization sends an exhilarating buzz straight to my core. He exists in a realm where the rules don’t apply to him. In his kingdom, he is God, and the rest of us are either believers or blasphemers.

And the Lord shows no mercy toward those who sin against him… or against me.

This is the first moment I truly realize the depth of his obsession. He would burn the fucking world down and lay the ashes at my feet.

Alek sees the darkness within and doesn’t judge me for it. Instead, he coaxes it out of me, making me realize we are two twisted souls connected as one.

I look up and meet his eyes, and my confession falls from my lips. “I love you.”

Surprise is one emotion I’ve never seen grace Aleksandr Kurochkin’s face, but he drops his villainous façade as I speak the words aloud. His lips part as his icy gaze melts, staring at me in disbelief.

He propels forward, kicking Chad aside. Nothing is between us when he grabs my face and kisses me with such raw, unfiltered passion it steals my breath away. I clutch his shoulders to remain upright, my head dizzy from the heady mix of vodka and cigarettes lingering on his tongue.

His dark love is laid bare in his kiss. The dopamine rush is unlike any he’s given me before, and all I know is I want him, every piece of him, until our bodies are joined as one—the way our souls are.

When he pulls back, we’re both left breathless. His reverent gaze captures mine, and I lose myself in its infinite depths.

“I love you, too,” he whispers. He presses our foreheads together, and we close our eyes, panting hard and hearts thrumming.

“I know how I want my revenge,” I murmur, clutching him.

“Name it, my love, and it’s yours.”

It takes every ounce of my resolve to part from Alek, to tear my gaze from his to assess the two hostages on the floor.

I look Chad in the eye, then Johanna, and the fear I find there feeds me.

“You two are going to fuck,” I say, enunciating the k. “We’ll film it and upload it. That’s the only way either of you could ever understand what you’ve done.”

Alek’s face stretches into a deranged grin, baring his teeth like a hungry predator. “I love the way your mind works, malishka.”

Chapter 20

Willow

I think it was Gandhi who said, “An eye for an eye makes the whole world blind.”

But did he ever taste vengeance as delicious as this?

As soon as I reveal my plan, Chad glances at Johanna. The guy is a horny bastard, so the sex part will be a treat for him.

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