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“I know. Go—you’ll be late…or later.”
When he’d finally gone, Theo slipped her laptop and notebook into a satchel out of habit more than anything else. It was unlikely she would write anything today. She looped Horse’s leash through her arm and locked up. It was something of a relief to be alone, to be able to think about what had happened.
She began walking toward Benders. Horse was well trained. He walked happily beside her without straining the tether, which was lucky, as Theo was pretty sure she would be unable to hold back an animal his size if he decided to chase.
She tried to think calmly about the night before. The man who’d walked out of Dan’s house without a backward glance. She’d watched him drive down the street. If he’d glanced into his rearview mirror, he might have caught a glimpse of her. Theo shuddered.
She wondered what Dan had gotten himself into. He didn’t write the kind of controversial books that made readers want to kill you…she didn’t think. It was sometimes hard to tell what would upset people. His books were literary thrillers, fast-paced and exciting, but written with a visceral sense of place and a sharp insight into the human condition. His victims were rarely minorities or women and never children, and there were no political undertones to his writing.
He’d not spoken to her of siblings, so she’d assumed he didn’t have any. And she realized he had not spoken of family at all—no passing mention of his childhood or school days in all the time they had talked. Perhaps there was someone from his past who had done this, someone he had once wronged, who after years of repressing a murderous rage had been triggered by an unrelated incident to find and murder Dan Murdoch. She stopped, startled and a little appalled that she was already starting to storify Dan’s death. Dan, who she had been starting to love. What was wrong with her? It was positively ghoulish.
There were quite a few people at Benders when she and Horse arrived. It was unusual at this time. When she was close enough to hear snippets of conversation, she understood why. Dan’s death had reached the media, and those who knew him had come to Benders in search of information. For a moment, Theo considered turning around, leaving. Indeed, she might have done so if Laura had not called her name. The server was dressed as usual in unbroken black. But today her eyes were rimmed red as she embraced Theo.
“So you’ve heard?” Laura asked, wiping her face with the bell sleeve of her blouse. “Oh, Theo, it’s just too awful. Here in Lawrence! How could this happen to Dan?”
Theo nodded silently. Clearly, Laura did not know that she had found Dan’s body.
Laura clasped Theo’s face in her hands. “Come on, let’s sit down. Would you like a cup of tea…or perhaps something stronger? Everything’s on the house today.”
Theo secured Horse outside and gave him the bone-shaped biscuit treat she had in her bag, before allowing Laura to bustle her inside. The other members of staff who had known Dan were there, though they were not on shift. They each hugged her like family. It seemed this was an impromptu wake.
Laura grabbed Theo’s hand and introduced her to the woman who sat a little apart from the others, in the booth in which Theo had first seen her with Dan Murdoch months before.
“This is Veronica Cole,” Laura said. “She wanted to meet you especially. Veronica is…was poor Dan’s agent.”
“Professionally,” Veronica qualified. “Aside from that, beyond that, Dan and I were the best of friends. He wanted me to meet you just a couple of days ago, but I had to get to another meeting. I can’t tell you how sorry I am that I rushed off. If I’d known…”
Theo was still not accustomed enough to the spectrum of American accents to pick the agent’s origins, but she recognized a privileged education in her voice. “I’m very sorry for your loss, Ms. Cole.”
“Ronnie, please. My sympathies in return. Dan spoke often of you.”
“He did?”
“Of course. He thought you were very talented. In fact, he sent me your manuscript…but we can talk about that later. This is not the time.”
“He sent my book to Day Delos and Associates?” Theo asked, bewildered. Dan had refused her request.
“Yes. I’m sorry—it was gauche of me to mention business at a time like this. I came here hoping to meet you, and maybe find out more about what happened.” She stopped, closed her eyes, inhaled and exhaled slowly, and began again. “I’m afraid the police would only tell me that Dan had been the victim of violence…that he’d died in his own home.”
“The papers don’t say much more.” Jock, a dedicated barfly who wore his long gray hair in a ponytail and generally occupied a stool quite close to their table, held up the Journal-World, Lawrence’s local paper. “Sounds like a burglary.” He shook his head. “In that neighborhood—hard to believe.”
Theo wondered whether she should tell them what she knew, what she’d seen. A part of her desperately wanted to do so, to unburden herself from knowing somehow, and the other part could not bring herself to talk about it. The decision was made for her by a sudden swell of tears, and Laura’s arms were around her again. “Oh, honey, let it out. Crying’s the best medicine for a broken heart.”
If Theo had wished to protest that her heart—though sore—was not actually broken, she was not given the opportunity, as she was plied with tea and sympathy and platitudes.
Theo pulled herself together, embarrassed. “I’m sorry, it’s just been a bit of a shock.”
They all murmured in agreement.
“Benders is gonna be strange without Dan,” Jock said. “He’s been coming here for years. Gave the place a bit of class to have a writer-in-residence—like the old days, when Burroughs used to hang here.”
“He never really spoke to anyone before you,” Laura said. “Used to be quite standoffish.” She smiled knowingly. “That first day he sat with you, I knew it was the beginning of something—
“We weren’t—”
Jock interrupted. “If it was or it wasn’t, it ain’t our business.” He cast a warning glance at Laura.
“I just meant that at least Dan was happy these past months,” Laura said putting her arm around Theo and scowling at Jock. “And I think that was down to you, Theo.”
