Page 72 of Cross My Heart


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Before we can delve further into what’s going on with Ledger, my father, Devereaux, and Chloe are all congratulating Roman and I.

As we step into the dining room for brunch, the atmosphere comes alive with animated discussions of weddings and babies. Conversations swirl around us like a whirlwind, punctuated by laughter and excited chatter, filling the space with an energy of anticipation and joy.

In this moment, Roman stands before me, a vision of pure beauty that steals my breath away. His smile stretches wide across his face, illuminating his features with an infectious warmth that radiates pure bliss.

We sit around the table, and I couldn’t be happier.

“I can’t believe everything that’s happened this past year.” I think about all the things, starting with the Greedy Girl murders, to having to pretend to be in a fake relationship with my best friend.

“All good things,” Roman says. He focuses on Ledger. “Now we need to get you a woman.”

Ledger rolls his eyes. “No, thanks.”

A slow smile spreads across Devereaux’s face. “Really? Not even Posey? The woman you’re babysitting?”

“Babysitting?” Chloe and I say together, sharing a look of confusion.

Ledger runs his hands into his hair and tugs at the ends. “That’s a story for another time.”

Roman smiles at me, glancing at the locket around my neck. I beam up at him, and open it, revealing a picture of him alongside the picture of my mother. “You told me to keep who I love the most closest to my heart. So, now you are.”

Roman leans closer to me in his chair, wrapping an arm around my shoulders. “I love you so fucking much,” he whispers in my ear, running his fingers over my locket.

“I love you too.” And for the first time in my life, I’m excited about what’s to come. It’s thrilling—terrifying—and completely everything I’ve ever wanted in the world.

Want more Greer and Roman? CLICK HERE to get a Bonus Epilogue for these two.

Thank you for reading Cross My Heart. Stay Tuned for Ledger’s Story with Close Your Eyes, coming soon.

Cross My Heart holds a special place in my heart because in 2023 I experienced something like what Roman’s facing. Anxiety crept up out of nowhere and started ruling my life.

In early 2023 I had a medical emergency, and after that I started having severe health anxiety. Anytime my heart rate would race, it would spiral me into a panic attack.

Anxiety is something I never thought I could have. What have I got to be stressed about is what I would always say?

Once I realized I had anxiety, and had been experiencing anxiety attacks, I began scouring the internet for answers. I knew I could overcome my anxiety.

There’s so much info out there, and at first it was overwhelming. I kept thinking, how can I control my anxiety when I don’t even know when an attack is coming? And everything kept saying, breathing. Meditation.

And I never understood. I’d always say, well why meditate when I’m not feeling anxious? I needed to know how to control my attacks. The thing I learned was, meditating is teaching you how to breathe, so when you HAVE an attack you know how to breathe through it. Because let’s face it…the only way to get through an attack is breathing, calming down, while changing your mindset.

It was mindset I needed to change. I also needed to know exactly what was happening to my body during an attack. My heart is racing, why? My breathing is shallow, why?

Once I learned the basic anatomy of what was going on, I was able to work on controlling myself. I knew the attack was just a huge surge of adrenaline surging through my body. I wasn’t dying. I knew my body couldn’t keep producing adrenaline, and my adrenals would fatigue, and I just had to wait for the adrenaline to leave my system. Breathe. Relax. Let the adrenaline run its course. It’s almost over.

There’s so many helpful things on the internet, and some of the main takeaways I learned were…

Where the mind goes, the body follows. This is so true. I thought writing this book would be therapeutic for me. I thought writing about my anxiety would help me more. I couldn’t have been more wrong. Writing this book has, in a way, brought me right back to the height of my anxiety. What I mean by that is…when your mind is constantly focused on the anxiety, your body will follow. Writing this book has brought my anxiety to the forefront of my mind, and in the past week alone I’ve nearly had a few attacks.

Now…let’s examine that phrase one more time… Where the mind goes, the body follows. We all know that when we think about getting sick, we get sick. When we think about anxiety, the anxiety is present.

Now, what if you changed your thinking to more positivity. I’m healthy. I’m strong. I can do hard things. Your body will follow.

So, if you suffer from anxiety (and I’m sorry if you do because I’d never wish anxiety on anybody) try not to focus on the fact you suffer from anxiety. Instead try to think about how healthy and strong you are. Once I’m done writing this…I don’t ever plan to think about my anxiety ever again. I am healthy. I am strong. And so are you…

Anxiety is not a one-size-fits-all experience. Each individual's journey with anxiety is unique and deserves understanding, empathy, and support.

Just as every person is different, so too are the ways anxiety manifests. Some may feel it as a constant weight on their shoulders, while others experience it in intense bursts. No matter the form it takes, anxiety is valid and real.

Let's remember that support looks different for everyone. While some may find solace in talking openly about their struggles, others might prefer a quieter, more private approach. Respect each person's coping mechanisms and offer your support in the way that they need it most.

There's no one "right" way to overcome anxiety. What works for one person may not work for another. It's a journey of trial and error, filled with ups and downs. Encourage patience, self-compassion, and seeking professional help when needed.

Above all, let's foster an environment of kindness and understanding. By acknowledging that everyone's experience with anxiety is different, we can create a community where individuals feel heard, supported, and empowered to navigate their unique paths to healing.

Together, let's break the stigma surrounding anxiety and embrace the diversity of each person's journey. We're in this together.

Source: www.allfreenovel.com
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