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Smiling, I can’t resist the surge of emotion that rushes through me.
We can worry about whatever hurdle we have coming later. Right now, I want to focus on this, on us.
This time, it’s my turn to crash my lips down on hers, and the untamed passion we felt moments ago returns instantly.
“Fuck, I love you,” I growl and claim her lips again and again, until I don’t know where she ends and I begin.
“I love you,” she murmurs between kisses.
Ever so slightly, she pushes against my chest, and I let her lead. I’ll follow her wherever the hell she wants to go.
Her fingers skim the small sliver of skin above the waistband of my uniform shorts, and my body jumps at the contact. I can’t even fucking help it. My dick twitches instantly against my cup, and the sensation has my eyes rolling to the back of my head.
God, it feels like it’s been forever since I’ve been with her. I want nothing more than to be as close as possible right now. But there is no way in hell we are having sex tonight. Not after everything we’ve been through to get us to this point.
“Charlotte, slow down.” I pull back, breaking our kiss.
“Oh God…you don’t want to…” Her face falls, and I catch her chin as she tucks it into her chest.
“Look at me. I want to…fuck, I want to. But not tonight. Not after I just got you back. I’ll make up for it.” I smirk, and her eyes glimmer. “I promise. Tonight, I just want to be with you. I want to hold you and kiss you. We will have time for more later.”
The light in her eyes fades, and I worry that maybe she regrets everything that just happened.
Her lip quivers, and she says, “That’s the thing, Reed. I don’t know how much time we really have.”
Gulping, I bite my bottom lip to fight back any burning tears forming. I know something’s wrong. She looks tired. Her hair is almost gone. Clearly, something is wrong. But I’m not going to lose her, right?
“I-I have…” Her bottom lip shakes. “I have breast c-cancer.”
Oh God. Oh God.
Everything clicks into place, and it finally makes sense. I know why she pushed me away. She’s told me the story a thousand times. The story of how her dad loved her mom so much that a part of him truly died with her.
FUCK!
All the times I was short with her and a dick. I hate myself so much more for making her feel even worse than she already did. But I will make that up to her if it’s the last thing I do.
She shies away from me, but I’m not letting her run away from me ever again. I pick her up, and she wraps her legs around my waist and her arms around my neck.
“Please, stop trying to protect me from the potential pains of loving you; it’s impossible. I’ll never be able to stop loving you.” I kick the balcony door open and carry her through the threshold, shutting the door behind us.
I don’t stop walking until we are in her living room. Gently, I set her down on the couch, and I sit directly beside her. But it still feels too far away. Grabbing her hips, I lift her back up and place her in my lap and wrap my arms around her waist.
Now that we are situated, I breathe her in and say, “Tell me everything. I want to know every single thing that has happened since the day you left my house.”
Her bottom lip trembles. “I understand if you’re mad at me and you continue to be mad. Like, I would get why you would—”
“Stop it,” I cut her off. “Char…” I force her to look at me by gently lifting her chin. “Am I happy that you lied to me about being sick? Absolutely not. As long as you never do it again. I’m not mad that you did what you thought you had to do, Char. I love you. Nothing will change that, and nothing will come between us.”
18
Charlotte
Last night was…exhausting…and perfect. I didn’t want to tell him the truth, but I knew once he had me cornered on that balcony, I wouldn’t be able to go through with my original plan. Maybe, deep down, that’s why I ran out there, like I somehow knew that under the stars, all of my secrets would surface, and he would truly find me.
After he carried me inside, I completely broke down. I told him everything he wanted to know and everything that I’d been dying to say out loud. He cried with me—of course he did. Because he’s the most empathetic man I’ve ever met.
I told Reed all about Ella. Once I started, it was almost impossible for me to stop gushing about that little ray of sunshine. He couldn’t stop looking at me and smiling as I spilled every sweet moment that she, Harper, and I shared. A similar smile to the one I woke up next to this morning. I’ll never get used to being loved by him.
