Page 3 of Bastard-in-Chief


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“You want to try that request again?” I give her a look. She’s taken to living here better than I have, probably because she gets the bedroom and doesn’t sleep on the pull-out couch like I do. The night I left Jake, she didn’t ask any questions when I told her to pack her things, even though it was almost one in the morning. Just like I wasn’t surprised she was still awake. No one could have slept through the shouting match between Jake and I when I discovered he’d been cheating on me.

We’d stayed with Lauren for about a month while I looked for a new place for us. Even though she'd offered to let us stay as long as we needed, once I’d been able to scrape together enough for a deposit, I’d moved us into this one-bedroom apartment. It was too small, but it was near her school so she could walk, and it bordered one of the nicest neighborhoods in Portland, so I felt safe.

Emma stops, gives herself a little shake, then plasters a smile on her face and says to me in a saccharine-sweet tone. “Mama, may I please go to the movies with Bella and Mike? And may I please borrow your white wedges?”

“Who’s driving you?”

“Mike is picking Bella up now, then they’re coming to get me.”

“Fine, just don’t stay out too late. And don’t be obnoxious.” It’s my usual admonition to her, it has been since she was twelve and started hanging out with her friends without direct parental supervision. She’s a good kid and I trust her, but teenage girls are obnoxious no matter how good they are. “What time do you think the movie will be over? It’s already seven o’clock.”

“I think it starts at eight so…” Her pretty face scrunches as she does the mental math. “Midnight? Is that ok?”

“Yeah, just be home right after, ok? Text me when the movie gets out, please.”

Emma leans down to kiss me on the cheek. “I will.” She disappears from view to pull my shoes from the back of the closet we share.

I make myself comfortable on the couch again, covering my legs with a blanket. I’ve got my Kindle in one hand, a glass of wine in the other, ready for a perfect Friday night. I left Lauren at work two hours ago, stuck in a meeting. “Hey Max,” I say to Lauren’s raggedy old cat. “She’s still at work buddy.” I scratch under his mottled chin. Max peers at me with his good eye, turning his cheek into my fingers so I can scratch a spot behind his ear.

Lauren and I found Max our senior year of college, a poor little kitten who’d obviously lost a fight with something bigger and meaner than him. We’d taken him to the emergency vet and gotten him stitched up before sneaking him into our campus apartment. We managed to keep Max a secret, but when Jake and I got married, Lauren kept him. He’s old now but going strong. Emma and I consider him our cat too, he just never lived with us because of Jake’s allergies. Now, he happily comes to stay with me and Emma whenever Lauren is working late or goes out of town.

Max curls up on my feet, his body stretched between my calves like a sausage, a comforting warmth as I scroll absently through my phone. A knock on the door has me looking up in time to see Emma emerge, makeup carefully applied.

“Bye Mom.” She kisses the top of my head as she walks past me.

“Hi Ms. Sophie.” Bella waves from the door as Emma opens it.

“Hi sweetie.” I wave back. “Have fun, be good.”

“We will!” the girls call back as they close the door, giggling. I take a sip of my wine and settle into my book. I’m supposed to be beta-reading for one of the writers in my group, but my mind is too distracted to concentrate. Instead, I pull up an old favorite, hoping Pippa Grant’s Beauty and the Beefcake will help me forget about the mess I’ve made of my life.

I’m wallowing in my feels, reading Are’s voicemail to Felicity, when Lauren lets herself in the front door. “Honey, I’m home!” She pulls her shoes off. Max hops off my lap and goes to rub himself against her legs. “Hi Maxy-poo,” Lauren baby-talks him, picking him up to rub her cheek against his.

“Did you guys eat already?” She makes her way to the kitchen.

“I made beef stroganoff. There’s a plate for you in the fridge. And an open bottle over here if you want some.” I shake the bottle of wine on the coffee table.

“I’m dying for both.” Lauren brings a second wine glass. I put my Kindle down and fill it while she heats up her dinner. “What would I do without you?” Lauren sits next to me a minute later, plate in hand, already stuffing a forkful of food in her mouth. “I haven’t had so many home cooked meals since college. Is it horrible of me to say I’m glad you got divorced so you could feed me more often?”

“You just missed me cooking for you.” I laugh. “You did just fine without me for fifteen years.”

“Don’t remind me—it was a dark time in my life,” Lauren says dramatically, still shoveling food in her mouth. “Whatcha reading? Anything new I should be on the lookout for?” Lauren and I were assigned as roommates our freshman year at the University of Oregon and bonded immediately when we discovered each other’s secret love of romance novels. I’d dropped a pile of books as I was moving in and she’d picked up my copy of Nora Robert’s Born in Shame, thinking it was hers.

“Nope, just rereading Ares and Felicity. I don’t have brain space for anything new right now.”

“Oh man, I love that one. To haikus!” Lauren and I click our wine glasses together before taking a sip.

“What kept you at work so late?” She ends up working overtime most nights, but tonight is unusually late for a Friday. I’ve been working there for three years as an administrative assistant after one too many clients yelled at me at the non-profit health services organization I’d been working at since we graduated. I don’t mind not having a fancy title in exchange for the steady nine-to-five schedule and never having to worry about if my paycheck is going to come on time. It also means I have more time to work on my writing.

“Surprise visit by one Theodore Sutton.”

I groan with her at the mention of our CEO’s name.

“Is it just me or is he more bastardy than ever?” She takes another bite.

“He has been particularly grumpy this week. I’m pretty sure I heard someone crying through his ear buds yesterday morning when he walked in. What did he want with you?” I add another few inches of wine to her glass.

“It’s not important.” Lauren waves it off. “I don’t want to think about him. How are you? It’s been a week since your birthday, have you played with any of your…gifts…yet? Wait, where’s the munchkin?” She looks around.

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