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The sound I make at the nip of pain is a cross between a moan and a yelp before I melt into another kiss.
Reaching up with both hands, I brace them against the headboard, pushing against the force of Julian’s hips. My orgasm creeps closer and closer, creeping up from the tips of my toes to the spot where Julian’s perfect cock is hitting me in all the right places.
“Almost. There,” I grunt, hands pressing against the headboard as hard as I can.
“Come for me, Frankie.” Julian slips a hand between us, his thumb rubbing against my clit. It only takes a few more strokes to set me off, my orgasm barreling into my core. “That’s it, fall apart.” His words are a growl, barely audible.
I blink my eyes open to find Julian staring down at me, grinning. “Feeling better?”
My cheeks flame at his question, and embarrassment floods through me. “I, uh. Yeah.” I turn my face away, studying the folds of his dark blue curtains, unable to look him in the eye.
A strong finger turns my face back to his, Julian catching me in a deep kiss. “Come back.” His hips rock against mine as his lips and tongue pull me back into the moment. “Stay with me.” His hand is warm against my cheek, keeping me from turning away, but I know that if I really wanted to, I could. “I want to see you fall apart for me again. May I?”
I’ve barely nodded my consent when he pulls me to my knees, guiding my hands to the headboard before he enters me from behind. Minutes later, I come again, pressed up against the wall, Julian’s thumb circling my clit as he pounds into me.
He rolls me on top of him, fingers clasped tight with mine as he thrusts beneath me. “I need you to come one more time for me, Frankie.”
My nerve endings are on fire, but his touch soothes and strokes every fiber of my being. “Julian, I’m so close. I can’t…come with me.”
He stiffens beneath me as yet another orgasm ripples up my spine, our breathy moans combining as we both come hard enough to see stars.
Boneless, I flop onto the bed beside him and immediately make it awkward. “So, uh. Thanks?”
Julian scrunches his face, like he can’t tell if I’m serious. My hands are tucked up under my chin, my fingers twisting together. “I mean…uh.” I bite my lip, knowing anything I say right now will only make it worse.
Julian gently pulls my bottom lip free, running his thumb across it before taking one of my hands in his. “Rocky, don’t talk yourself out of it.”
“Talk myself out of what?”
“Remembering this as fun.” He leans in and plants a soft kiss on my forehead. “No matter what, I want you to remember tonight as a night you chose to feel good. You don’t need to justify it, or overthink it, and especially don’t regret it. I won’t.”
He rolls off the bed and makes his way into the bathroom to clean up. With him gone, the chill of the room seeps into my skin, raising goose bumps all over. Holy shit, I’m freaking naked in Julian’s bed.
Julian and I just had sex. Like, really amazing, seeing stars when I come, sex. What ifs invade my mind. Was it as good for him as it was for me? Is he going to want to do it again? What if I want to do it again?
“I can hear you thinking from over here.”
He steps out from the attached bathroom, still naked, and all the voices in my head shut up in favor of the one that’s singing “Holy shit, holy shit, holy fucking shit, that man is gorgeous” over and over. In my mind, I’ve always compared him to Thor, but seeing him now, I realize I was wrong. He’s better, because he’s real. And stalking toward me with an amused expression on his face.
I roll off the bed to stand up and his face changes, a question in his eyes. I want to cover my body with my hands but don’t. Instead, I scurry past him into the bathroom, closing the door behind me so I can panic in private.
While I pee and clean up, a million thoughts run through my mind, too fast to articulate. But most of them are variations of this changes everything, and I don’t know if I’m ready for that to happen. And I definitely don’t know how to reconcile how good Julian makes me feel with the irritating voice in my head telling me I shouldn’t be doing this. That good girls don’t have sex without being in a committed relationship.
That stupid voice sounds an awful lot like my mother.
By the time I’ve splashed water on my face and gathered my courage, they’ve boiled down to this—I’m going to go out there, ask for a blanket, and sleep on the couch for a couple hours. I’m nervous to stay, but the thought of leaving feels worse.
When I open the door, Julian is leaning against the doorframe. “Your clothes are still wet, so I hung them over the chair to dry. You can borrow this.” He holds a T-shirt out, putting it on me himself when I don’t take it immediately. Once my face is through the neck hole, he leans down to drop a kiss on my forehead while I slide my arms into the sleeves. It hangs almost to my knees, and the short sleeves reach past my elbows.
“I can sleep on—” I haven’t even finished my sentence before Julian scoops me up in his arms. Three steps later, he sets me down on the bed, climbing in next to me and drawing the blankets over us both.
Huh. That did not go according to plan.
“But what—?” I lay on my side, facing him, the blanket clenched in my fists.
“What does it mean?” He shrugs, then reaches out to tuck a strand of hair behind my ear, loosening my death grip on the sheets. “It means whatever we want it to mean.”
“But—”
