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I extend my hand toward her, a gesture of commitment. "Count me in. I'll do whatever it takes to help my sister." Our hands clasp, and I feel a sense of partnership, a shared determination to bring Summer back from the depths of her own mind.
As I leave Dr. B.J.'s office, a wave of determination washes over me. I fight the urge to raise my fist in triumph. There's a path before us, a way to save Summer. My mind spins with the tasks ahead, the to-do list expanding rapidly. But for now, my focus is on finding Jaden and dealing with the aftermath of my mother's visit.
Jaden is perched on Anne's desk, his attention on her. Jealousy prickles within me, an emotion I have no right to feel. He glances at me briefly, a glint of something unspoken in his eyes. Yearning surges within me, mingled with a pang of shame. But this is no time for indulging in such feelings. "Ready to go?" he says, his tone curt, all business.
“Where’s my mother?”
“She left. We came to an agreement. In exchange for leaving Summer alone at Harmony Hills, I invited her to visit us tomorrow night. She accepted.” Jaden strides through the door letting it slam in my face. Rude much.
I scurry after him. “Why would you do that? She’s crazy. There’s no telling what she’ll do.” I suck in a breath and rush on. “She stabbed a person in Montreal for no reason. Just because she felt like it.”
“Why wouldn’t I? She’s your mother and besides, the mentally ill have a lot of things to teach us if we’re willing to listen.”
No, they do not! We get in the car, the Grand Canyon-sized chasm gaping between us. The car ride is tense, the air thick with unsaid words. My mind churns, a tempest of conflicting emotions. And then, against all reason, my mouth runs ahead of me. "So, is she your girlfriend?" I blurt out, my voice laced with a hint of bitterness.
He gives me a look that's a mix of annoyance and something else I can't quite decipher. "No," he replies curtly, the word hanging heavy in the air. A moment later, he adds, "I told you, I don't do relationships."
His words send a jolt through me, a reminder of the chasm that separates us. But I can't stop now. "Actually, you said you don't do love," I retort, my tone defiant. "And just so we're clear, I'm not looking for a relationship." My voice hardens. "And if I were, it certainly wouldn't be with you."
He looks at me, his eyes holding a challenge that I can't fully grasp. The connection between us pulses, a mix of heat and tension. "Why not?" he asks, his curiosity a tangible force between us.
A surge of anger rises within me, mingling with hurt and resentment. "Because you're too much like E.S.," I snap, my words sharper than intended. "I'll never be with a father figure, and that's exactly what you are."
The atmosphere in the car shifts, his anger mirroring my own. "I am nothing like your stepfather," he seethes, his grip on the steering wheel tight enough to turn his knuckles white. "Don't you dare compare me to him."
The tension is thick, suffocating. My temper flares, my own anger taking control. "Fine," I retort, my voice cold and biting. "I take it back. You're nothing like him. Happy now?"
His gaze burns into mine, a storm of emotions raging within him. And then, with a sudden change of tone, he speaks again. "I won't tolerate lies.” His words are laced with finality. "I'm nothing like him, and if that's what you think, then maybe we should end this right here."
My heart sinks, a mixture of regret and fear welling up within me. I can't let this unravel, not now. "Wait," I blurt out, desperation tinging my voice. "I take it back. I didn't mean it like that."
The tension between us eases slightly, but the rift remains. I'm left grappling with my own impulsiveness, my own inability to keep my emotions in check. As we continue the drive, silence stretches between us, the divide growing with each passing second.
As we arrive at our destination, Jaden's demeanor is all business. The ache within me intensifies as he steps out of the car, his presence a reminder of the growing chasm between us. I can't help but wonder if this is the beginning of the end, if the bond that seemed so promising will shatter under the weight of our own insecurities.
I follow him, my resolve firm. No matter what lies ahead, Summer's well-being is my priority. I may not have all the answers, and my relationship with Jaden may be as tumultuous as a storm at sea, but I can’t deny the pull between us. But I have no fucking idea how to bridge the gap between me and Jaden before it's too late.
15
JADEN
I am seething. I usually do my absolute best to avoid any intense emotion, but I’m coming out of my cave to embrace this one. How dare this little shit compare me to an abuser like her fucking stepfather. I pour on a full head of righteous indignation. Yet there’s a little voice in the back of my head that sounds a lot like Rayne’s that makes me want to find out why she thinks I’m like her despised E.S. Maybe she has a point. I can be a real controlling asshole sometimes.
I slam the heel of my hand into the steering wheel as if it’s at fault then press the button to engage my Ferrari Portofino’s cruise control. Goddamn cars! I hate these fucking computerized cars these days and yearn for the satisfaction of throwing a stick into gear. Yes, indeed, I’m diving deep into displacement mode because redirecting my fury is a lot easier than addressing it. Never mind that I’d probably strip the gears in the mood I’m in, which is precisely one of the reasons I’m in the Portofino today. I push back the uncomfortable truth that I’d chosen the Ferrari because selfish bastard that I am, its console gives me easier access to get my arm scratched. I don’t stop to question why I, who abhors physical contact that isn’t sexual, crave this connection with Rayne.
“What is wrong with you?” Rayne’s voice cuts through the noise this latest inferno of emotions brought on, although for a startled second, I realize that this time, she’s the cause of the noise.
“Absolutely nothing.” I keep my face impassive as I’m a master of doing and give her a look that would scare off even the strongest of my adversaries. Although I’d like nothing better than to drop into my cave for a few hours, I’ve no choice but to stay in the present for this meeting with the task force. But I’d be damned if I’ll let her get to me.
“Oh no you don’t, CC. I can feel the anger coming through whatever this strange link is that we have developing. And you’re the one who said no lies.” Rayne folds her arms across the enormous sweatshirt she’s chosen. Little does she know hiding her body has the opposite effect to what she's trying to achieve.
I drop an extra ounce of steel into my voice. “About this Captain Control bullshit, another thing you should know about me is that I don’t do pet names. This is not a relationship. Am I clear?”
Rayne’s chestnut eyes practically shoot flames as she glares at me, and for a brief second, the image of steam streaming from her ears dashes through my head. I keep my eyes trained on the road as her hot glare burns the side of my face.
“Crystal clear. Now it’s my turn. If there is one thing I’ve learned to be good at,” she says hotly, “it’s staying on topic. So answer the fucking question. Why are you so pissed off, Jaden?” This time she emphasizes my name as if it’s a curse word, making me wish I hadn’t opened my big mouth about her moniker . . . because I kind of liked it. That’s the problem. But that’s all the poke I need for the fuse to ignite the bomb. I pull the car over to the shoulder of the road, shut off the engine, and turn on her.
I bleed every part of my conflicting emotions into my fury at this young upstart. “Fine, you want to know why I'm pissed off? As if you couldn't figure it out. You compared me to a child abuser, the lowest of pond scum who should be neutralized. And anyone who would make such a comparison is no friend of mine.”
