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Fully dressed, Jaxon stepped around me to leave. His fingers grazed my back softly, but I ignored him. I refused to even look up at him after what he did. I know he did it on purpose. Jaxon tugged that mask off my face. But why did he do it? No, why do men do that? I should’ve learned my lesson with Asher.
No one has said anything about it, but I sense that everyone knows. The looks I get in class and the lowering of voices when I walk into the lounge. I feel like the whole school knows that Charlotte Howland is a sex worker.
I pull my comforter over my head and hold onto my shoulders for warmth. The temperature outside is dropping, and classes are hard as hell to get to without slipping on your ass on a patch of black ice. I check my smartwatch, and it’s only five in the afternoon. It’s been dark since 4:00 p.m. The cold feels wet and penetrating; it clings to my back. I lie there underneath the covers. The dampness from my breathing makes it hard to breathe. What’s going to happen to me?
A tap on my door forces me to get out of bed, and I wish I could see through the wood before I open it. I open it, and my heart leaps when I see Asher. He takes a quick step forward and stands in the doorway, so I can’t shut him out.
“You weren’t in class,” he says.
“I didn’t feel like going.” I take a step back and let him inside.
“You have plans for Thanksgiving?” he asks, and I shake my head. “I’m staying on campus,” he continues, “I was going to sneak my little brother into the dorm.”
I lie back down on the bed, and he sits down in the chair, pulling it close. “I didn’t know you had a little brother,” I reply.
He nods. “He starts Monarch next fall.” A dark look knits his brows together. I wonder if his brother is like him, or will they torture him like they did me?
“He’s not spending Thanksgiving with your uncle?” I ask.
He shakes his head. “What about your father? You’re not going back to see him?”
I turn my gaze to the wall and place my finger against an imperfection in the paint. “I’ll wait until Christmas and see him then.” I feel the bed move as Asher sits down on it. I move over to give him more room, and he lies down beside me.
“Charlotte, I don’t think anyone knows,” he whispers, “and I didn’t tell.”
I place my head against his shoulder, and he moves his arm underneath my head. He’s nice and warm, and heat is coming off his body in waves. I crave his warmth, and I want to be held. I want him to tell me it’s okay, even if it’s a lie.
“I didn’t think you had.” I pause. “Why do you think he did it? Why did you do it? Why did you do something so awful when I wanted to please you?”
His body tightens, and his fingers press into my shoulders. He waits too long to answer, and I wait to see if he’ll tell me the truth. “You have to start listening to me,” he says. “These people will tear you down, Charlotte. You have an attitude, but you don’t know how to play this fucked-up game.”
“You mean I won’t do anything to win,” I reply. “Not anymore.” I cuddle against him and moan softly as his fingers stroke the skin peeking out from under my T-shirt.
“Come on,” he says, moving to get up, “Let’s go study in the lounge. You shouldn’t hide in here.”
I raise my head to look at him. “You would tell me if people knew. Wouldn’t you? I want to know the truth.”
“Some people know about the video, but not anyone you need to care about.” He sighs, running a hand in his hair. “But if someone says anything to you, you let me know.”
We leave my room and head for the lounge. And I’m actually grateful to have Asher following behind me down the hallway for a change. We sit down on the couch, close together, and I don’t care if people see us together, looking like a couple. I’ve gone from dreading him to needing him. I cuddle against him, and he grins almost shyly as I stare into his deep blue eyes. For a moment, no one’s around, and I lean in to give him a gentle kiss. He presses his mouth to mine, and despite what I did with another guy, he doesn’t turn me away.
He pulls back and smiles. “Charlotte, you have me. You only need me.”
People come in and out of the lounge, and soon, I’m convinced the snubbing is my imagination. No one acts off, and if anything, they seem surprised to see me with Asher. For a fleeting second, I wonder if it’s because I’m with him that they wouldn’t dare say anything. But I shake it off. Does Asher have that much pull here?
But my good mood tanks like iron sinking to the bottom of the ocean when Tracey comes into the lounge. Her eyes widen to circles, and she stares at me as if I’ve done something illegal. I ignore the reaction and wave to her. She hesitates and then checks to see who’s around before she approaches us. Is she acting like that because of Asher? No, because she greets him first.
“Hey, are you going over to Alpha later?” she asks him.
Asher scowls and then shakes his head quickly. “No, I’m hanging out here tonight. I have to study for my exams.”
She nods and then slowly looks at me. “Are you studying too?”
I nod slowly. “Yeah, do you have plans for Thanksgiving?”
Tracey avoids my eyes, and her words rush out of her mouth like a rehearsed statement. “I won’t be around. I was invited to go out of state. I have to head off now. Goodbye.”
Even Asher watches in amazement as Tracey almost collides with a kid entering the lounge.
