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It’s inappropriate to want another man. But knowing how Caleb felt last night makes me feel closer to him. He wanted this, too. He felt the same temptation to sin that I’m feeling now, and we’re taking this leap together. All three of us.
In a frenzy of desire, Dean works off my top, and I unclasp my bra. As he works off his pants awkwardly, I slip mine off as well, pulling off my underwear, too. Then, I’m naked. And so is he. And suddenly, it feels so real. I can’t stop shaking with anticipation.
On his knees between my legs, he stares down at me as if he’s in awe. “You’re so fucking beautiful,” he says, running his fingers along my belly and down my thigh. Over the stretch marks and patches of cellulite. Every inch of my body that I criticize, he relishes in, touching me as if I’m something special.
I keep waiting for the voice in my head to tell me to stop, but it never does. There’s no voice. No presence of God or an angel on my shoulder or fear of hell. There is just me and this man and a million complicated emotions that require so much more than the black and white of right and wrong to determine whether or not we should be doing this.
Reaching down, I stroke his cock, watching his mouth go slack as I bring him pleasure. I’ve already had Dean in my mouth. It feels like he and I have already done so much together, but sex feels monumental. Touching him like this while we’re alone might as well be the craziest thing I’ve ever done.
He runs his fingers through my folds, and I moan with pleasure at the sensation. Those are not Caleb’s fingers.
“Fuck, you’re so wet,” he mutters, leaning down to press his lips to mine. “You’re ready for me.”
“I’m ready,” I cry, wrapping my legs around his hips to pull him into me.
“Wait, wait, wait,” he stutters, pulling away. “I need a condom.”
And as much as I hate to wait another moment for this, he’s right. I can’t let another man come inside me when we’re trying so hard to conceive. This situation doesn’t need to be messier than it already is.
He dives for the nightstand, and I watch with impatience as he slides a condom over his fat cock. In the space of a few moments, as he gets himself ready, I feel the passion dissipate, and the anxiety creeps in.
Is this wrong of me? Even if I know I’m not doing this as revenge against Caleb, it feels that way at the moment. Is that how I want my first time with Dean to be? Nothing more than a revenge fuck. It’s so much more than that.
Once he has the condom secure, I feel the warm, thick tip of his cock at my entrance. The tip slides in, and I panic.
“Wait!” I shout, grabbing his hips and holding him there.
His eyes widen as he stares down at me with concern. When he tries to pull away, I stop him. With just the tip of his cock inside me, I freeze so neither of us can move.
“This isn’t revenge, you know?” I say, staring into his eyes. “I want you to know that.”
His brows furrow as he gazes down at me. “Then what is it?”
Tears spring to my eyes as I reach for him, interlocking our fingers as I bite my bottom lip. “Dean, I care about you. I want this with you, and it has nothing to do with what happened last night.”
Slowly, a smile stretches across his face.
“I’m…falling for you,” I add.
“I’ve already fallen for you, Briar. From that first night you came into my apartment, I’ve been crazy about you.”
Without pressing his cock farther into me, he leans over and kisses me. I want to hold his face here and live in this moment forever.
“Record it,” I say. “I want to see it.”
He smiles wickedly against my lips. “You want to send this dirty video to your husband and show him what a bad wife you’ve been?”
The idea sends a thrill through me, and he’s right. I do. I want Caleb to see this side of me.
“Yes,” I whisper against Dean’s lips.
After pulling away from our kiss, he reaches for his phone on the bed from where it fell out of his pocket. Still pressing just the tip of his cock inside me, he aims the phone down at the spot and hits record.
I love the look on his face as he stares at the screen. “You ready?” he mumbles sexily.
“Yes, please,” I reply with a rasp in my voice. “Fuck me.”
Grabbing my thigh with his free hand, he stares down at his cock as he yanks me toward him, impaling me on his length. I let out a cry as he fills me.
