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“Right now,” Elio whispers against my temple as he works my clit in expert, erotic circles, “you need to feel something other than what you were feeling earlier tonight. You need pleasure. You need oblivion.”
I nod, even though it’s hard with his fingers closed around my throat, because he’s right. He’s ripped me open with a few well-placed words and now he’s the only one who can put me back together. He gently presses on my throat, and I choke out a moan, my eyes rolling back in my head as my pussy clenches.
“You need this, don’t you, Deirdre?”
I can’t even nod now, let alone speak, because of his grip. But I don’t need to, because he knows the answer just like I do. I need this. I need to let go of some control. Let him take away my breath and take away my pain.
He slides a finger inside me, and I try to gasp, but barely get half a breath in my lungs.
“I’ve strangled men with my bare hands,” Elio suddenly rasps, and I must be perverted because my pussy clenches again. “I know how much pressure to exert. I know when to stop.” His hand tightens around my throat, and my breathing becomes the barest whistle. “But even so…” He crooks his finger inside me, stroking firmly until I’m shaking, the blood roaring through my body as it searches for oxygen. “Tap my shoulder twice to make me stop.”
I’m already on the cusp of coming, about to fall the fuck apart, but Elio stops the movement of his finger.
“Tap my shoulder once, now, to show me that you understand.”
My hands feel like they’re made of lead, but I raise my right one and tap his shoulder.
He groans. “Good little Songbird.”
He starts working his finger again, firm and fast and filling me, adding another while clamping down on my throat until all I can feel is the desperate, breathless writhing inside me. That panicky pleasure that narrows my focus of feeling to my chest and the place between my legs. I don’t even know if my eyes are open or closed – everything is black. The oblivion he promised me is rising, constricting all around me, a pulsing, living darkness that expands inside me until I come.
Just as my insides clamp down on Elio’s fingers, he pulls them out. At the same moment, he releases my throat. Instinctively, I suck in a huge, raw breath, the explosion of oxygen only adding to the intensity of the moment. I’m flying and falling at the same time, and only Elio can anchor me. I reach quivering arms around his neck, pull him down to me just as I feel pressure, pressure right there. A searching nudge, and then the violent forward motion of a thrust inside.
Pain surges up alongside the pleasure. My mouth falls open in a soundless scream as Elio completely fills me, stretching me, breaking into me. Breaking down the last of the barriers between us. I’m crying again – I can hear the sobs more than I can feel them. Because all I can feel right now is him. The pain of him inside me. The searing juncture of our bodies.
Elio lets out a ragged sound, then thrusts again. My arms are still around him, and I’m squeezing, holding onto him. I could tap his shoulder twice. See if that would make him stop. When he thrusts a third time, harder, I almost do it because it hurts too fucking much.
“Does it hurt, Songbird? Fuck, I can feel you opening for me. Feel you bleeding for me.”
Two little taps. That’s all it would take.
Elio’s moving faster now, and something in the angle has changed, because even though it still hurts there’s something new undulating behind that pain. The wetness of my orgasm and the blood of my lost virginity eases the way ever so slightly for Elio’s girth until he’s grinding even deeper than before, hitting a screaming, shuddering place inside me that makes me feel like everything is loosening and tightening all at once. I’m going to come again. I’m going to come, even while I’m hurting. He’s going to make me. It’s building so intensely I almost feel like I’m going to pee myself. One of his thumbs starts rubbing hard against my clit, and I know I’m nearly gone now.
“Every time I pull out I can see your blood on me,” Elio groans. “You’re claiming my cock with your blood the same way I’ve already stained you with mine. That first night, Songbird, do you remember? When I got shot and bled all over you.” He seems to lose his rhythm, his hips snapping chaotically as he breathes. “I would have fucking died for you that night.”
The bandages on his shoulder scrape against my wrist as I cling to him. Cling to the man who I should be doing everything I can to run from. But I can’t run – not now. Not while my body is reacting like this to his. I moan through the tears as my pussy convulses.
“Yes,” Elio hisses between clenched teeth. “My sweet little Songbird. My good fucking girl. Come on my fucking cock just like that.”
And once again, like so many times before, I cannot help but obey. I scream, muscles clamping down on his so hard I can tell it’s affecting his movements. He jams himself further inside as white-hot stars spin out in my pelvis, scattering and shattering. I’m so tight around him, so fused to him, that I feel it happen. Feel the throb of him deep inside as he shunts his hips forward for the final time.
He’s coming, shuddering and tensing and coming, coming, coming so hard inside me. As his desire spills into me and mixes with my blood, he lowers his mouth to mine and says directly against my lips. “We are fucking bound together, you and me.”
As aftershocks of my orgasm wrack my body, my pussy squeezing him like I can’t bear to let him go, I know that he’s right.
There’s no way to come back from this now. Not for him.
And not for me.
Chapter 38
Elio
If I could stay inside of Deirdre forever, I would. It’s like I was fucking made for this, made for her, like my entire body was designed to have her arms and legs and cunt wrapped around me. It’s the closest thing to peace I’ve felt since childhood.
“I need to go clean up,” Deirdre whispers.
“No, you don’t,” I reply instantly. I want her drenched and staying that way. Stained with my fluids and her own. I don’t want to already feel her pulling away from me, which I’m sure she will. Starting with washing this night off of her skin.
