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I drag my hand down from her breast, drumming a demanding rhythm against her clit with my thumb, and I don’t even need to watch her or hear her to know that she’s coming. I can fucking feel it. Feel the ecstatic flutter and clench of her pussy, drawing me deeper than I would have thought possible. Her hips rise right off the mattress, and her blue eyes are fucking glued to my snapping pelvis. I follow her gaze to the place where my dick disappears into her quaking body. I don’t think there’s anything more blisteringly erotic or more painfully heart-searing than watching my blood-stained cock claim her over and over and over.
It makes me fucking feral.
I press down even harder on her clit until she shouts and spasms, twisting like a wild thing beneath me. I’m going to come. I can feel tension warming the base of my spine, my balls drawing tight.
Between bouts of thrusting heat, I feel something suddenly sharp inside. It’s almost like dismay. Dismay that I’ll never be able to fuck this girl out of my system. Every hit of her just drives me deeper, deeper, fucking deeper, until I don’t think I’ll ever be able to drag myself back out. I’m lost to her in a way that I’ve never been lost to anyone.
Frankly, it is fucking terrifying.
I crash my mouth down upon hers, because I need to feel her more, need to feel something other than the overwhelm of my own unmooring obsession. She doesn’t even try to fight me. Her mouth opens instantly, submissive for fucking once, and it sends me near out of my mind. I surge into her with my tongue at the exact same moment my cock throbs and then explodes inside her. I shove myself deeper even as I spew, like I’m trying to fucking crawl inside her. And in that bleary madness I decide that it doesn’t matter if I’m lost to her, if I’m lost to goddamn everything, because the only thing I’ll ever need is right fucking here. Moaning and trembling beneath me, wrapping herself around me half-unwillingly, like a part of her doesn’t want me but all of her fucking needs me.
And maybe I’m not even lost.
Honestly, how can I be?
How can I be when my home has become a person and that person is in my fucking bed, my arms, our bodies bound by agony and ecstasy and blood?
I said that to her the first time. We are bound together, you and I.
I feel it even more acutely now as I fill her pussy for the second time tonight.
Feel that throbbing connection, the blinding truth of it.
And the truth is that Deirdre O’Malley – soon to be Titone, thank you very fucking much – is mine.
Whether she wants to be or not.
Chapter 6
Deirdre
As much as I don’t want to admit it, when Elio comes, there’s something violently beautiful about it. About him. Every carved muscle straining beneath scarred skin, the tendons in his neck tight, his face flushed in a way that almost makes him look younger, amplified by the messy fall of rogue locks of hair tumbling over his forehead.
But make no mistake, there is nothing innocent or boyish about this man.
Another aftershock of my orgasm rushes through me, sending a stinging flutter over Elio’s hardness. I’m so wet down there, and I’m terrified to look and see how much of it is blood.
I can’t believe I let him fuck me again.
Did I even let him? Everything is such a hot, chaotic blur in my mind, pain and pleasure and need and shame all intermingled until it’s a swirling mess I can’t make sense of. One thing I do remember clearly, though, is the stupid way I rocked against his erection when I thought that he was asleep. My cheeks flood with heated colour at the memory of how brazen the act was. So fucking dumb. Because look where it got me – coming and bleeding on his cock again.
I try to focus hard even as Elio gives one more gentle rock inside me that makes stars explode behind my eyes.
I never said no.
How can I honestly tell Elio I don’t belong to him, how can I ever extricate myself from the dark pull of him, if in the heat of the moment I can’t even do that much?
Hell, my arms are wrapped around him right now! Like I’m the one pulling him closer instead of the other way around.
I can tell him I don’t want him but we’ll both know that I’m a liar.
But wanting someone isn’t the same as accepting them or loving them. I can want things that are ultimately bad for me. Maybe that’s just human nature.
Drugs. Booze. Elio.
All addictive.
All toxic.
