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“Wicked woman.” He grips my waist, stilling me. “You need me to say it?” His pitch-black eyes drill into mine. “Fine. I want you. With or without the tears.”
The declaration settles between my legs. I want to lower to my knees and suck him down my throat. I want to choke on his desire and aggression.
But lust is lust. So what if we’re attracted to each other? He wants me to forfeit the only solid plan I have. Because he’s jealous? Possessive? Wants to piss on something that doesn’t belong to him?
The old me would’ve swooned at the notion. That’s how Monty won my heart.
And lost it.
The old me is dead.
I decide to tackle this from a different angle. “Leo thinks he has some sort of claim over me. I don’t understand it, considering only a few weeks ago, he wouldn’t piss on me if I was on fire.”
“He had a change of heart.”
“Why?”
“He kept you at a distance because he wanted a different outcome with you. When he told the other women the truth about us, it didn’t end well.”
“I know what happened with them. This is more than being honest about Denver’s plans. He’s gone from hateful to overprotective with me. Why?”
“You let him in. You protected Wolf. You gave him a taste of heaven in the workshop. I don’t know, but somewhere along the way, he fell in love with you.”
Do I believe that? I don’t know what to believe. “And what about you, Kody? Do you love me?”
“I can’t.”
“Good answer.” I nod, ignoring my irrational hurt. “You’re smart.”
“Why would you say that?”
“I’m broken.”
“You’re not—”
“Listen to me.” I glare at him through a sheen of fresh tears. “I loved my husband, and he fucked it away. I won’t cut myself open for that again. Marriage, monogamy, romantic love—I gave up whatever I thought we had because it’s all bullshit.”
“We’ll see.”
He doesn’t get it.
“There’s something I haven’t told you.” I wipe my nose and blink away the persistent well of misery. “When I made the bargain with Denver, he had one stipulation.”
“I’m listening.”
“He told me I had to fuck you. All three of you. And he requires evidence. You know what that means.” I jab a finger at him.
He grabs it, holding onto it. “You didn’t have sex with Wolf.”
“I still have all winter.” I yank my hand away. “I’ll do what needs to be done.”
My words make me cringe.
What have I become?
Desperate.
I’m a desperate, immoral creature, willing to do anything to survive.
Not that having sex with three hauntingly gorgeous Alaskan men is a hardship. But to do it for a bargain isn’t who I am.
At least, it’s not who I used to be.
I mourn her. The woman my mother raised. Monty’s faithful wife. Sitka’s trauma nurse of the year.
When that woman disappeared without a trace, how many people mourned her?
Not many.
“I’m sorry I didn’t protect you.” Kody rearranges my legs, wrapping them around his waist and tucking me close. “I’m sorry I left you.”
“Your apology isn’t necessary. You did what anyone should’ve done. As I did.”
“I owe you my gratitude.”
“You owe me nothing.”
“I owe you everything. How can I ever repay you?”
“Help me get us out of here.”
“I will. I promise.”
“How? I’ve thought through every scenario. If we don’t give him something, we’ll spend the entire winter at war.”
“We’ve done it before.”
“Not with a woman involved.”
“There were others.”
“None that you’ve kissed or spanked or dry humped against a rock.”
“I didn’t hump—”
I press a finger to his sculpted lips. “I make things messy. We might be able to protect one another for a while, use the buddy system, lock ourselves in a room. But six months is a long time to keep our guards up, always looking over our shoulders and checking our food for poison.”
He bites my finger.
“Stop that.” I stroke his cheek, as if I could tame this barbarian. “He knows how to single us out, manipulate us, drug us, and use us against each other. What about his damn kin punishment?”
“We went along with kin punishment because it kept him from sexually assaulting us. It was a flimsy truce. But the moment he touched Wolf, that truce ended.”
“He’ll find another way. I don’t want to live in fear. Doing it my way, on my terms—”
“Isn’t happening. Here’s how this is going to go.” He cups my face. “We’ll keep Denver away from you, away from each other, until he makes the final supply run. That will be soon. When he returns with the provisions we need for the winter, we’ll make our move.”
“What move?” My pulse quickens.
“We’ll neutralize him. Lock him up. Keep him alive. And by spring, we’ll be ready to get that plane in the air.”
“And if we can’t fly it?”
“We’ll figure out another way. And another way after that if we must.”
I consider, chewing on my lip.
