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“Let Theresa suck you off, and maybe it will make you forget everything until Palmer returns.” Harper smiles widely at me and disappears into the family room.
I flip her off, but unfortunately, she doesn’t see it.
I walk out of Palmer’s house through the back door as usual, and Theresa’s smile drops when she sees me.
It’s at that moment that I realize that something has to be done. Something I don’t look forward to doing, but it’s not fair to Theresa no matter what happens with Palmer and me. Theresa can’t be stuck in the middle while I try to figure out what the hell it is that these newfound feelings for Palmer mean.
Crossing the driveway, my stomach turns over. I hate hurting people. I never would’ve pursued Theresa if I knew these feelings for Palmer were still festering, lying dormant all these years.
“Hey.” She thumbs over her shoulder. “I think I just passed Matt and Palmer.”
“What do you have there?” I ask, ignoring the Matt and Palmer topic and inquiring about the two grocery bags in her hand. Thinking about Palmer on her date agitates me, and if I’m going to break up with Theresa, I don’t want it to be on bad terms because I was in a shit mood when I did it.
Lake Starlight is a small town, and although maybe I don’t know everyone, I don’t want Adley to hear one day what a jerk her dad is.
“Dinner!” Theresa seems oddly happy, almost as though it’s fake. “And I’m making your favorite. Beef tenderloin and my mushroom sauce.”
Fuck. I love that dish. Guilt races up my spine. I cannot let her go to all the effort of cooking me my favorite dish and then breaking this off. She walks ahead of me to go into the house. I haven’t broken up with anyone since my crazy ex with the baseball bat, and I don’t want a repeat of that experience. Since her, I only had flings. Women I never saw more than a few times and never wanted a future with.
I follow Theresa into the house and catch her throwing away the orange chicken I just got for lunch yesterday. Then I watch as she places pre-made salads in the fridge along with some yogurt.
Watching her, I rethink our time together and whether my feelings for Palmer are just from jealousy or some weird alpha male protectiveness. Is this a rash decision? Theresa could make dinner and spend the night for me to test this theory, so I don’t end up throwing away something I’ll miss later on.
But something in my gut tells me I’m only making excuses. Besides, I’m not one of those dicks who string women along.
“I think we need to talk,” I say, shocked that I’m so blunt.
Theresa turns and looks at me, her face sinking. It confirms that she’s not surprised it’s come to this. She knows what I’m about to say.
She shuts the fridge and keeps her distance on the other side of the room. “About?”
“Us.”
She nods. “What about us?” Her tone turns almost sarcastic.
“I’m not sure…I mean…”
“Spit it out, Hudson.” She crosses her arms, and her eyes narrow. She’s pissed.
“If you know what I’m going to say, then why do you need me to say it?”
“Because I want to hear the words from your mouth.”
I look at the floor then back up at her. “I think we should break up.” God, how junior high does that sound? I clear my throat. “I mean, things have changed.”
“Not for me. I still love you.”
Love? My heart skitters, and not in a good way. She loves me? When did love enter the equation?
“Don’t look so alarmed. It’s a natural emotion when you’re dating someone.”
Okay, it’s clear to me that we’re not going to end this on good terms.
“I just didn’t think we were there yet. You caught me by surprise.”
Her arms drop, and her shoulders rise and fall in a deep sigh. “No, Hudson, you weren’t there yet because you’re too afraid to commit to someone.” I open my mouth to respond, but she’s not finished. “If you could commit to someone, you would’ve done so with Palmer when you got her pregnant. Or hell, maybe earlier.”
She has no idea what my past with Palmer entails, that it was Palmer who kept us as friends in the beginning, not me.
