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I had to see him.
That kid was all alone. Fatherless. His mother, shot dead. The boy I’d watched all afternoon…had a rougher start at life than me. And if I couldn’t scare his aunt into whisking him away, then I had to take care of him. He was half of me—supposedly.
Could it be true?
This kid’s constant presence in my thoughts rattled me. I couldn’t sit, so I got out and played games on my phone. My gaze flicked to Violet hiding out in the bakery. I stood outside, my back against my Challenger, when V texted me.
V
Inside. Looking now.
You know what to do.
A few minutes later, he sent me photos. Jack’s birth certificate, blank except for her name, and a handwritten letter.
My Dear Sis,
If you’re reading this, I’m gone. It breaks my soul I can’t be here for our little Jack, but I know you’ll love him like your own. You’ve always been the one with a big heart and strong arms to lean on.
There is something I need to tell you.
The identity of Jack’s daddy. His name is Achille Costa. Now, listen close, Violet. It’s real important you keep away from him, for Jack’s sake and yours. Trouble follows a man like him, and I want none of it touching y’all.
I’m sorry for keeping this a secret and leaving you with such a heavy load. But some stories are too tangled and dark to drag into the light. Trust me. My biggest wish is for Jack to have a life full of love and far from harm that could come from his world.
You’re gonna be the best thing that ever happened to Jack. My love for you both is as wide as the sky and as deep as the ocean.
Please honor me by looking after him.
All my love,
Elise
The air left my lungs.
A life full of love—is that what she thought I couldn’t give? I reread the sentence, shock ricocheting inside me like a pinball. A life full of love and far from harm. From me? My family would’ve protected her. Christ, the irony of Elise warning Violet against the only man who could’ve saved her.
She was one to talk. She hadn’t been a role model, either. If the dumb bitch had been honest, she’d still be alive. But like everybody else, she’d seen me as a threat, not a father. It stung.
Images seared my brain of Elise with this kid. She’d stolen a piece of me. She hid my son away, and my boy was growing up without me. Elise and I were never a fairy tale, but our story wasn’t supposed to haunt me like this. What was the plan for when he got older and started asking questions? Would she call me a deadbeat who’d never been involved?
Did I want to be involved?
The phone buzzed.
V
Is this enough?
Yeah. Get out of there.
I wired him money. Then I paced the parking lot, yanking at my collar. My skin heated as though from a rash. How the fuck could I be a dad? I needed more proof than my name in a letter. The paternity test—a cheek swab—would give me answers.
I pulled myself together and drove to her apartment building, parking in the lot. Eventually, she made it back home. I waited ten minutes after she’d disappeared inside. Then I got out of my car and climbed the steps to her apartment. I stood at her door, my hand hovering in midair. Years of living on the edge hadn’t prepared me for this. I stared down death without flinching. Now I balked at a door because of a child. Every instinct screamed to step back and think, but the pull was stronger than any I’d ever faced.
I raised my fist and knocked.
NINE
