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It was strange to think only three months had passed since the end of the war. They made it seem like three decades, and while I hadn’t been out in the main world yet, I could already tell how quickly people were willing to forget simply for the idea of peace.
“I don’t know what you want me to do about that,” I said after a long silence.
“You have a clinical, tactical mind, Kor.” I could hear the cushion shift as he sat forward. “You don’t need sight in order to organize and plan, and those Alphas—the ones with two brain cells to rub together—they’ll already know that.”
And well, he wasn’t wrong, but my confidence had been shaken, and even if I could manage to shit, shower, and shave on my own in the next few days, I wouldn’t be ready to address a Council with the idea that they pledge fealty to me. Modern Wolves had worked hard to dismantle the idea that injury and disability made a Wolf weak, but Alphas were more instinct-driven.
“If one of them wants to take up a challenge,” I reminded him quietly, “I’m in no position to win a fight.”
“If one of them challenges you, there will be a fucking coup,” Orion said. “You have no idea…” He trailed off with a frustrated grunt, and I heard him stand, felt the cushion next to me sink down as he sat. “I know you’re gonna hate this, but you need to accept something, Kor. You’re an icon to these people—a hero for surviving—and if the Council has any goddamn sense, they’ll remember the reason why you rose in the ranks as fast as you did. And it wasn’t because you could draw claws out faster than anyone else.”
“I can still draw claws faster than any of them,” I grumbled, and he laughed softly.
“And in a few months, you’ll probably be able to accept and win a challenge if any of them are stupid enough to issue one. But they won’t be. They didn’t come here to make more mistakes or fracture us.”
I swallowed, then shook my head. “I know you’re having trouble with some of them.”
He let out a ragged sigh. “Just one. Lior,” he muttered, and I immediately bristled. Lior Miller had been in basic with me, and he’d led his company in a few charges along with mine, but he hadn’t lasted long in combat. He feigned an injury and was given a position within the government, and he worked his way up from there. He’d been vying for power for a long while, and it was no surprise he was the hold-out. He held traditional values, and it was a surprise he had joined the rebellion in the first place.
“You’d think he’d have challenged Marion for office by now,” I said.
Orion let out a small, angry laugh. “A few of us think he’s feeding information back to him. He’s not as privy to as much information as he thinks he is. He might put up a fight about appointing you Head Alpha, but you’ll have backing from the rest.”
“Do they know?” I asked, unable to raise my voice beyond a mumble. I had been too nervous to ask who was on the Council before now, but I realized I couldn’t avoid it forever.
Orion was silent long enough that I knew the answer. “It was easier to brief them now. Before you had to meet them face to face. They have your recovery file.”
My fingers itched with the need to drag claws out, my spine tingling with a want to shift. I could feel my wolf even closer now, and I wasn’t sure I’d be able to hold out trying until the moon. I could still feel the weakness in the beat of my heart, but it was stronger every passing hour.
“No one thinks you’re weak,” he started, then let out a ragged sigh. “They’re furious, Kor. Everyone is furious, which is why they need you. They need you to stoke their anger.”
“They need to look at the blind Wolf,” I corrected him. “They need to see what the humans are capable of, so they don’t lose sight of their goal.”
His hand dragged over my arm, a brief touch—the exchange of pack scent. “Yes,” he said, not pulling punches. “The unexpected bonus is that they’re getting a leader who knows what the fuck he’s doing.”
I allowed myself a single moment to wonder if I’d ever again have the confidence in myself that he had in me—but it was only a moment. The reality was, Orion was right. It didn’t matter how I felt, or how limited I was now. What mattered is that if the people would follow me, I could use it. Because the last thing in the world I would ever do is sit back and accept that the humans had won.
* * *
I woke the next morning still disoriented, feeling like I hadn’t slept a wink. My body ached like I’d spent the night running, and I had bits and pieces of dreams flashing, though I couldn’t catch any solid images. The scent of Misha was fading from the shirt I kept under the pillow, and I was reaching a point I wouldn’t be able to ignore the demands my wolf was making.
I needed to at least know he had survived.
I managed a shower on my own and found clothes in the drawer that weren’t sweats. I felt a hint of panic as I slid the shirt on over my head when I realized that never again would I be able to trust my own senses in what I was wearing. Cameron had promised me he had tools to help—tech that would allow me to regain some of the independence I’d lost—but the pressing headaches and the flashing lights had canceled my physical therapy, another hospital appointment taking its place.
My stomach was achingly empty, and during my one and only session, I had failed in trying to figure out the coffee machine by touch alone. Cameron had suggested later in the day that I consider instant for a while, but I’d been too frustrated to give the idea any real consideration. What I needed to do was shop. I was regretting that now as fatigue settled heavy on my shoulders, and all I had to fuel me were a few pieces of toast and some fruit.
It was unsettling in ways I hadn’t expected, and I knew a lot of it had to do with how far from the civilization we were. This place beneath the earth—in the wide, expanse of the tunnel network I still didn’t entirely understand—was not supposed to be home.
My wolf whined as I realized there was no real place to run, even when I would be able to shift, but the Council must have had at least some solution to the problem. Wolves underground would go mad if they couldn’t feel the pull of the moon after a while—but if we were all in hiding…
The knock on the door startled me, mostly because I had again lost the thread of my surroundings. But I recognized the beat of Orion through the bond, and I found the door a little easier this time.
“We’re late,” he said, his voice a little harried.
I took his arm, and I could feel tension thrumming in his body. “What’s happening?”
“We had another report come in. Six more Wolves went missing. We had some operatives in the area, and they managed to recover four, but two Omegas were taken.”
