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Leaving Misha behind in the hospital felt like digging out one of my organs. I held him against the wall and kissed him until it felt like my injured lung would give out, then I listened to his footsteps as he shuffled back to his bed. The knotting, the bonding, surviving his heat hadn’t changed anything. Neither of us were sure if he would survive the moon looming just days away, and I still had to stand before the Alpha Council.
And more than that, I still had to heal—I had to adjust. I had to find a way to prove to myself—and to the rest of the Wolves—that I could hold the appointment of Alpha over all of them and lead them to victory in the new shape this war had taken.
I could sense Orion far down the corridor when Misha’s door opened, and I knew instantly that it was Danyal who was waiting for me on the other side instead. I wasn’t quite sure how much time had passed—being underground and unable to see had thrown off my internal clock.
Holding out my hand, he stepped into my grasp, and when the door closed behind me, my claws dug into his skin before I was aware of it.
“No one is going to hurt him, General,” he promised.
I took a deep breath, then withdrew them. “I don’t want him kept here.”
Danyal was silent for a long while as he walked me down the hall. “I understand, and I’m not necessarily opposed to recommending he be released into your care, but I want you to take some time and consider what that means in regards to your own recovery.”
“I’m weak,” I told him, “but my internal injuries are healing. I anticipate a full shift long before the full moon.”
He let out a small sigh as I heard a set of double doors click. There was a rush of air as they opened, and amongst all the other Wolf scents, I caught Orion’s nearby. “That’s not what I’m talking about. I understand and appreciate that you’re coming to terms with your blindness. I’m incredibly impressed at the progress you’ve made even now. But you have to understand that setbacks are inevitable, and I need you to be certain you want him there if and when they happen.”
My feet slowed to a stop, and I pulled him with me. “We’re bonded. Keeping him apart from me, weakens us both, and if he has a hope of surviving this moon…”
“I’m not certain he’ll shift,” the doctor said quietly. “There have been changes to his DNA—to the structure of it. There have been some changes I can see in his X-rays, and while he doesn’t heal at the same rate a Wolf does, there’s a reason all of his injuries were gone within hours of arriving here. All of those things indicate a strong possibility his body will attempt the shift, and that will kill him. He hasn’t become a Wolf, Kor. Maybe if he’d stayed longer under treatment…”
I squeezed my eyes shut. “Are you saying he should have been left in that lab?”
“I’m saying I have no idea how advanced the humans’ research could be. No one should be forced to endure what the pair of you did. The fact that the Alphas haven’t sent rescue teams yet…” He stopped abruptly and let out a ragged breath. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean…”
“No,” I said, and I let him hear the anger in my voice because it had taken almost four months to free me—and I was the only one rescued. “You’re not the only one that feels like things around here have been moving at an unnecessarily slow pace. And maybe there’s a reason. I plan to find out today. But I stand by my statement, Doctor. I won’t accept his confinement here.”
“Then please call me when your meeting is over, and I’ll see what I can arrange,” he said, his voice tired and resigned. “Major Peterson is here waiting for you.”
I could sense Orion creeping closer, so I released Danyal’s arm and waited for him to approach. There were too many Wolves around for either of us to have a real conversation about what happened, so I took his arm and he led me down another quiet hallway, then through a set of doors. I should have felt relief coming out of the building, but even blind, I felt trapped in the caves without having access to the sky. I felt the distance from the moon, from the air, from the stars.
The fact that I would never see them again gutted me, but it would have been easier to bare if I could have felt wind on my face—if I could just know they were there.
“You’re a fool,” he said after a beat.
I scoffed. “I had no choice in the matter.”
“You could have denied him,” Orion said, but even I could hear the lie in his tone. Only a few Alphas could reject the call to a mate the way Misha called to me—and I had to wonder if it was stronger because the bond had been forced through the humans changing him.
“I won’t let him die because of what his father did,” I growled. “And if the Alphas decide to turn me way for it—for any reason—I’ll take him and go.”
Orion jolted at my words, and he wrenched his arm away from me before taking me by the shoulders. “Don’t be a fool just because you like the taste of his slick.”
Without really thinking, my hand went for his throat and squeezed until I felt him submit. “Don’t you dare. Not now, not ever. Do you understand me?”
After a beat, he let out a ragged breath and rasped, “Yes.”
I eased my grip, but I didn’t let him go, determined to make him wallow in the submission for his disrespect. “You are my brother in more ways than one, but Misha is not simply a human. And even if he were,” I added in a low voice, “he didn’t deserve what was done to him.”
Orion scoffed. “Would you have said that about any other human? Ones that fought in the war?”
The answer was far too complicated because in some cases—no. And in others—yes. Some had been young and foolish, brainwashed by the bigoted education their schools provided that convinced them Wolves were mindless beasts. Some knew better but fought anyway because the humans in power had given them no choice.
And we had been no different. The Wolves I had under my command—the ones I sent home in coffins—would stay with me forever. I never lost the disgust deep in my bones every time my gaze swept over a batch of new recruits and saw that all of them were still getting over their teenage acne.
“There needs to be more than just a defeat of humans,” I told him, finally releasing his throat. I took a step back, but not far enough that I couldn’t feel him any longer. “This corruption is within our walls.”
“We know. What we fought for hasn’t changed, but understand that some of our enemies wear our faces.”
